tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63701152024-03-12T18:34:31.470-07:00I HAVE WRITER'S BLOGWelcome to The Procrastination Station.
A blog about life and its everyday adventures, books, music, relationships, travel, music, and anything else that crosses my path worth writing about. This is offered up to you, dear reader, with a trademark pinch of sarcasm and a generous helping of optimism.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.comBlogger267125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-49721933112467032572013-06-16T23:42:00.001-07:002013-06-16T23:42:22.733-07:00Things My Dad Was Right About: A List <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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In honor of Father's Day, I'm going to acknowledge things my dad was right about and post them here. I won't tell him to his face because that would just be too much to bear. The grin, the knowing look, the focused gaze when he gives a future piece of advice, remembering that once upon a time I admitted weakness. But my dad is freaking awesome, as anyone who knows him will say. This apparently includes the man at the convenience store in the town where we grew up, who tracked me down on Facebook just to ask me how Dad is and to say hello for him. This man has passed much knowledge to his kids (and anyone in earshot) over the past years, and I figured I'd capture some of it and share it. <br />
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<b>Things My Dad Was Right About </b><br />
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1. Buy your car in silver or gold colors. It shows dirt much less and you won't have to get as many car washes.<br />
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2. Always be organized and clean. People will respect you more.<br />
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3. Never bet "max" on the slot machine when all the lines are empty. Nothing good will come up on the next spin.<br />
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4. Save money. It doesn't grow on trees. Don't waste it. You'll be sorry.<br />
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5. If you buy an article of clothing you love and it's a reasonable deal, purchase it in multiples and save them. When you wear the one you love so much out, you'll have a backup and by then it may be out of production.<br />
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6. Pay your credit card bill balance completely, every single time.<br />
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7. If you couldn't buy it with cash, you probably shouldn't be buying it.<br />
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8. Always carry cash.<br />
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9. The main food groups are soup, salad, coffee and ice cream. Everything else is just because you people made me eat it. Ok, that last sentence is paraphrased, but I'm 100% confident he would gladly claim it as his own.<br />
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10. Carry mints.<br />
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11. The power of the nap.<br />
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12. Get educated.<br />
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13. Don't say bad things about people.<br />
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14. There is no shortcut. The only way you can successfully trade on the stock market long term is by fully understanding and studying the companies you invest in.<br />
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15. When you buy something, ask yourself "Do I NEED this?" Ideally ask it to yourself as if your dad is standing in the aisle of Target with you, questioning you before allowing you to make the purchase.<br />
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16. McDonald's coffee is excellent.<br />
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17. Don't subscribe to more than 2 magazines. Be honest with yourself, you don't read them.<br />
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18. Weigh yourself constantly and if you see something you don't like, act immediately. (He's been the same weight or less my entire life)<br />
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19. You throw too much stuff out. Think carefully about how you can repurpose every scrap of cardboard, every container.<br />
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20. Cell phones are bad for you. You don't really need one as much as you think you do.<br />
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21. Make sure you have chemistry with the person you're with. It's important.<br />
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There's a lot more, but I guess the edge on having him as my pops means I don't have to share it all in one swoop. Grateful for him, and grateful to mom for choosing him! I'm sure I'll write a similar post on her one of these days too. For now, signing off with Happy Father's Day wishes to any of you out there who are celebrating with your families. Thanks to all the dads raising the future generation- they give us hope!<br />
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<br />Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-49606752200084243892013-06-14T21:43:00.003-07:002013-06-14T22:16:59.950-07:00Confessions of a Juice Detox QuitterBefore I start, and as an advisory note to <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2007/09/i-hate-skinny-people.html"><span style="color: red;">my blog's drive-by haters</span></a>, let me define "quitting" - it happened 2.5 days into my 3 day detox, in my defense. And, as you'll read below, it's not because I'm a wuss.<br />
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Last year, a friend of mine highly recommended the Ritual Reset cleanse by <a href="http://www.ritualcleanse.com/"><span style="color: red;">Ritual Wellness</span></a> in Orange County. I filed it in the back of my mind. Juice cleanse? That was some heavy stuff, not my style. Give up food? I think not.</div>
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Fast forward a few months, and my bff asked me if I'd do a juice cleanse with her. Given that we run races together every month and have done numerous insane physical endeavors together, I figured if I was ever going to take it on, the time was here. So we signed up for <span style="color: red;"><span style="color: red;"><a href="http://www.ritualcleanse.com/">Ritual</a>'s </span>Seasonal Cleanse</span> and got ready for - well, we didn't know what. </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Confessions of a bad pre-cleanser</td></tr>
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<b>The Week and Night Before</b></div>
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Things not to eat before you cleanse? Jack in the Box. I was on the run, and tried to get a healthy food item (a chicken pita). Ok, and fries. But after a few fries, I threw them away! In any case, that's probably not the drive thru you should be hitting 24 hours before going into juice-only mode. Learn from my mistakes. Did I mention that I met up with a visiting <a href="http://jonyangorg.blogspot.com/"><span style="color: red;">Jon Yang</span></a> at <a href="http://extraordinarydesserts.com/"><span style="color: red;">Extraordinary Desserts</span></a>? Had berries with lemon curd and decaf coffee. I'd been warned that ditching caffeine is the hardest part of detox, so I figured I'd work ahead - I started tapering down a few weeks before and thought I'd be close to ready to go. Jon actually took a picture of me eating that night, but I'm not posting it here because I look stoned. Which is apparently how I look if I'm not powered by coffee</div>
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Detox Juice Cleanse Day #1</span></b></div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Our Ritual Cleanse arrives!</td></tr>
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Ritual offers to have your juices couriered to you between 12-6am the morning of your cleanse. In my idiotic decaffeinated stupor, I had messed up the address (uh oh, it was already happening...), but Byron called J and made the delivery. When J & I returned from spin class that morning (oh yeah, we were ambitious that first day) our cooler bags of juices were there. All 18 of them plus 2 juices in case we decided to work out during the cleanse (we wouldn't).</div>
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We broke open juice 1 of the Reset Cleanse, an organic mix of kale and other green loveliness. And I went off to work! I was feeling good and clean and knew I was doing something great for my body. Ready to do it!</div>
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By lunch I was feeling a little foggy/slow, which surprised me since I don't usually eat a big breakfast. Lunch included a meeting with some </div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Lunch with the guys. Guess which one's me.</td></tr>
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business colleagues. Two men whom I had warned ahead of time I wouldn't be joining in eating. A photo of our lunch table. Not photographed: Mikel making fun of me all through lunch and offering me bites of his veggie burger. A frequent faster, he assured me it's par for the course.</div>
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I went back home and kept back at work. I was feeling slow and the headaches were setting in, but I kept reminding myself that that's how detox works. The worst part about day 1 was the headaches and fogginess. I just felt like a space cadet, and probably would have felt crazy if I didn't have a friend to compare symptoms to. By 7pm I was completely exhausted and started feeling rough. I figured sleeping early (yes, 9pm) was the way to go. I was ready to break into the last juice of the day, #6, which is a nut milk and rather filling. I sipped it in bed while my eyes drifted to sleep. Day one, done!</div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Day 2</span></div>
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It felt great to wake up and see the line of bottles on the counter. One day done, no biggie! I had this. I was feeling lightheaded and I definitely had a headache, but I'd be ok. Exercise was definitely not happening, so I shelved the "Shred" supplement juices I had ordered when I was my old, optimistic self. I began sipping juice one and got on with my day. At my first meeting, I realized that I was barely coherent and found it difficult to have conversations through the veil of my headache. I explained to the lady I was meeting with what was going on (girl to girl, you can do this stuff). I hung in there as long as I could, but couldn't wait to go home and take a nap! (Yes, working from home has its benefits!)</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">one day down!</td></tr>
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After a nap and some Advil, I felt MUCH better. In fact, I started to feel splashes of that euphoria people always say they have on a cleanse. I hadn't felt it once, but I started to feel very clear. I took advantage of it and sat at the computer, cranking out my first really good work in 2 days. I even started to admit to some other friends what I was doing. I had this in the bag. If this is what detoxing is, sign me up! I can get behind this!</div>
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By 10pm I started to wind down and the headache was coming back, but I was feeling capable and at least I'd had a glimpse of what people always rave about with cleanses. Only one day to go...</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Two days, down!</td></tr>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Day 3: The Beginning of the End</span></div>
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I woke up with a raging headache and realized I'd had one most of the night. Had I even really slept? I moved myself to the couch with juice #1. I was almost done! I could do this. Bad toxins, begone! I tried to drink some water. And next thing I knew, I was... throwing up. Violently.</div>
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Photo from a deathbed</td></tr>
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I had heard different things about detoxes - that you'd spend quality time in the bathroom (maybe with some cleanses, but this one is based in food, so no), that you pee a lot (obviously), and that you'd have headaches. But nowhere had I read that you'd throw up so violently that you'd consider going to urgent care. I probably wouldn't have been surprised if I'd experienced it early on, but I'd felt pretty ok, so I got worried. But I wanted to be a trooper, so I went back to the fridge for Juice 2, a tasty pineapple juice, and next thing I knew, I was vomiting again. I scared the HELL out of the housekeeper, that's for sure. I moved myself to the couch (my place of refuge) and slept. After a few hours, the headache was only getting worse. I knew that my body needed electrolytes and something it could keep down. </div>
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Barfing and feeling like crap...hm. This was starting to feel like a terrible hangover without the awesome stories or debauchery. The following conversation ensued:<br />
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Me: "Lilly, why are you pushing yourself to continue this?"</div>
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Me: "I want to do this! I want to be healthy and learn better eating habits, and rid my body of toxins!"</div>
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Me: "Do you feel healthy right now?"</div>
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Me: "Um, no."</div>
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Me: "Did you learn what you wanted to learn?"</div>
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Me: "Yes."</div>
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Me: "Do you want to land in the urgent care explaining to a doctor that you overdid it on a juice cleanse? Do you want to be THAT girl?"</div>
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Me: (hangs head in shame) "No"</div>
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It was time to break up with my cleanse.</div>
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I knew my electrolytes were suffering, so I ate a few saltines and drank Pedialyte, and I passed out. I felt better, but not great. I had more saltines, so I could down a much-needed Advil. When I awoke, I was 90% old me. I could think straight, I felt optimistic about life!</div>
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Now, I'll admit, I'm drinking #4, a cayenne lemon water, as I type this. I learned a LOT in 2.5 days of doing detox, but it wasn't worth pushing myself through another 8 hours just to say I did. I regret that my first "real" food had to be saltines, but I wasn't about to add the price of a doctor's visit to the price of my fancypants juice.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">Afterword: </span><br />
I emailed with Ritual this evening and they responded very quickly-and compassionately. Because I felt better after having saltines, we were pretty sure it was a severe detox symptom and not anything to do with their juices. I've already recommended this particular juice fast to other friends. If you're going to do it, you should do a quality pressed juice like Ritual's. They send encouraging emails throughout the days of your cleanse plus their customer service is excellent. And, like I mentioned before, I was miraculously NEVER hungry throughout the time I did their detox. Now that I'm feeling a bit better, I may even drink the nut juice before bed. Done and done!<br />
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<b>What Juice Detox Fasting Taught Me:</b></div>
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*<i>Coffee is awesome. In moderation.</i> When detoxing from it makes you feel hungover, cranky, and shaky, that's a hold you don't want any beverage to have over you, no matter how tasty it is. This detox really opened my eyes to how much I relied on coffee for energy, and, sadly, how much coffee is responsible for my energetic personality :(</div>
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*<i>How much junk we pass as "food". </i>Compared to many people I'm a pretty darn healthy eater. But yesterday (day 2) I walked by a burger place, a place I would have normally loved, on the way to my car-and got nauseous. I was floored that it's one of my favorite foods. Remember, I was the person at Jack in the Box just two days before. I'm sure I'll eat one again, I mean I'm a realist, but it made me realize how desensitized we get to what we eat and how food like that definitely doesn't need to be part of a regular weekly rotation. </div>
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*<i>How sweet natural foods taste. </i>By Day 2, J & I were talking about how sweet the pineapple juice tasted- too sweet! The amount of sugar in our daily meals (many times snuck into your food by restaurants, making it tasty) had desensitized us to real sweetness. </div>
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*<i>How much I eat when I probably don't need to. </i> Of all the symptoms I felt during the cleanse, surprisingly hunger wasn't one of them. It kills me to admit that every women's magazine ever is right, but I guess I eat when I'm thirsty... or pissed. Trust me, people annoyed me while I was on my cleanse (probably heightened by my decaf-ing), but I couldn't reach into the pantry and hush them with a snack. It made me realize how often I do that, and how easy it is to let things slide off your shoulders when you are so foggy that you couldn't give them attention even if you wanted to.<br />
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*<i>Take on your crazy health endeavors with a buddy. </i>Having someone else texting you back that they really DO understand your misery makes a difference.</div>
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*<i>Try everything once</i>. I never thought I'd pull something like this off, definitely not for 2.5 days, and while I probably wouldn't do it again, I'm glad I did it once. As with detoxing on crappy food, same with taking caffeine out of the rotation. It just gives you a glimpse of the other side and what is/not working for you.</div>
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As a parting gift, enjoy <a href="http://www.buzzfeed.com/rachelysanders/what-a-juice-cleanse-is-really-like-terrible-not-healthy"><span style="color: red;">this hilarious clip</span></a> about juicing.</div>
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiq_hKy8KW3Kk5bXyyhvQyb63BVxqdSsGLALJT0vvz7xfNArEDvZO9b0l06uFwqDr98Ol2rhCV3Jr1aGRbL6a5_oc7wTgW5g4q6HVi1du9HBVtItSBteTVN9fEu3JgxjIo8crC/s1600/bottles.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiq_hKy8KW3Kk5bXyyhvQyb63BVxqdSsGLALJT0vvz7xfNArEDvZO9b0l06uFwqDr98Ol2rhCV3Jr1aGRbL6a5_oc7wTgW5g4q6HVi1du9HBVtItSBteTVN9fEu3JgxjIo8crC/s320/bottles.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">RIP my cleansing days </td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-85311309883281238492013-03-22T00:53:00.000-07:002013-03-22T01:00:35.359-07:00(Persian) New Year's: Resolution Redux<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJj4IzfY4P1MAAyQXPuUvcbM79C_wsw-xrk_3WcLu4sXPujf_6EmaLjee7x_S2FQObmf31JwpGQK9B1MdCdDD1fhofChyphenhyphenJKNQIYuFD8AfUGAJgCaMWKZj6_3PQnLhvQUTbtEWi/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-03-22+at+12.52.28+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJj4IzfY4P1MAAyQXPuUvcbM79C_wsw-xrk_3WcLu4sXPujf_6EmaLjee7x_S2FQObmf31JwpGQK9B1MdCdDD1fhofChyphenhyphenJKNQIYuFD8AfUGAJgCaMWKZj6_3PQnLhvQUTbtEWi/s320/Screen+Shot+2013-03-22+at+12.52.28+AM.png" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">(Borrowed from SF Bay Area Persians' FB page)</span></td></tr>
</tbody></table>
This time of year, I'm grateful for being bicultural (American and Iranian). While everyone else descends into the pit of self hatred and despair that naturally follows the ambitious and frankly hilarious resolutions of Jan 1, I join "my people" in ringing in Nowruz, or Persian New Year. My people don't do resolutions, so by March (we celebrate the first day of spring), I am pleasantly reminded that any decision to do so or to keep going with mine is entirely voluntary.<br />
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First, a quick recap of what Persian New Year <i>is </i>(taken from my Facebook post, which people may have appreciated if only because it gave them respite from me talking about how my weather is better than yours and the merits of <a href="http://www.everymansjourney.com/"><span style="color: red;">the Journey frontman documentary</span></a> (Yes, those posts happened. Maybe more than once...)<br />
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<i>For my American friends: Persian New Year falls on the moment it turns to spring (which is why your crazy Persian friends were all up at 4am posting at vernal equinox.) We celebrate by preparing (cleaning) the house, then gathering with loved ones to ring in the moment, standing in new clothes by a table decorated with traditional symbols of happiness, health and success. Then we eat. A lot. The world's baklava consumption spikes on this day courtesy of us. The next 2 weeks are spent visiting as many people as we can, to greet the new year with them.</i><br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>This holiday is the biggie for us - it's celebrated by everyone, regardless of religion - and it's a reminder of fresh starts and all the good to come. That's worth celebrating, don't you think? Happy New Year! (Norooz)</i></div>
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Persian New Year this year came at, oh 4:02 am. My family was feeling highly superstitious and sensitive after the recent and unexpected passing of my aunt, and so we decided to be sure to ring it in together at all costs. The siblings, the parents, we all got together in our new pajamas and welcomed the year with bleary eyes and big hearts and hugs. So, my second new year now squared away, it's time to revisit where I am with resolutions. My list, from January is <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2013/01/new-years-resolutions-2013-and-here-we.html"><span style="color: red;">here</span></a>:</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">1. <i><b>Learn Italian.</b></i></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 20px;">Started! Am signed up for the second course, even. Go figure that I got a lovely Italian teacher who a) speaks minimal English, meaning the entire class is in Italiano. Then go figure that we haven't really learned anything linear. Remember when David Sedaris' foray into French? Yeah, like that. </span><br />
<span style="line-height: 20px;"><i>Sciopero! Il pigiama! Capelli brizzolati! Pigro! </i></span><i style="line-height: 20px;">(Strike! Pajamas! Salt and pepper hair! Lazy!)</i></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">2. <b><i>Keep healthy but actually tempting foods at home - at all times.</i> </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">I wouldn't say "at all times" but I'm better about it! Now if I can just work on that whole "eating while standing up" thing. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">3. <i><b>Double my business. </b></i></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 20px;">On track.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">4. <i><b>Go to New Orleans.</b></i></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 20px;">I'm honoring my <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html"><span style="color: red;">bucket list</span></a> and booked the ticket shortly after the post. Going next week. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">5. <i><b>Start volunteering again.</b></i></span><br />
I'm talking to some organizations and hope to join a new one here in San Diego soon. Stay tuned (by which I mean, keep bugging me, so I do this).<br />
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6. <i><b>Hands Up</b></i><br />
My nails are long, perfectly manicured talons now and if someone starts to look a little too closely, I just do jazz hands. Problem solved.<br />
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7. <i><b>Write Regularly</b></i><br />
Obviously not. I am writing very regularly, just not for myself, not in the way I meant by my resolutions. I'm writing constantly for clients. So that's good and it means I'm spending my days largely doing what I love. But I'll get there. Need a routine.<br />
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8. <i><b>Do <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/"><span style="color: red;">fiftyfifty.me</span></a></b></i><br />
Doing it! I'm 10 movies, 7 books in. You think I watched the Journey documentary for my <i>health?</i><br />
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9. <i><b>Unplug more</b></i><br />
Not yet. Not even close, although now I want to more. It'll come.<br />
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10. <i><b>Get better at wasting time</b></i><br />
I haven't gotten great at wasting time, but courtesy of my entire college experience, I'm sure I have it in me somewhere. I have, though, gotten better at prioritizing what's important to me. And that feels somehow more important.<br />
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Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-2901271430908286482013-01-04T08:41:00.003-08:002013-01-04T08:45:12.092-08:00New Year's Resolutions 2013Time to do the recap of 2012's resolutions and see just where I fell. Here's my <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2012/01/resolve-this.html"><span style="color: red;">post from last year</span></a>, with my list of intentions for 2012. Recap below, with commentary. (Always with commentary.)<br />
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Posting my new ones because there's nothing like publicly painting yourself into a corner. So now I have to see them through.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><u>THE OL</u></span><span style="font-size: large;"><u>D YEAR</u> </span><br />
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1) <i><b>Do more yoga</b>.</i> I wanted to learn a headstand, which I did not get to. I did, however, for half of the year, go to hot yoga religiously. </div>
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2) <i><b>Don't eat standing up.</b> </i>Did so-so on this one. Eating on the run is apparently a way of life for me.</div>
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3) <i><b>Do fiftyfifty.me</b></i></div>
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Done and done! <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2012/12/fiftyfiftyme-2012-done.html"><span style="color: red;">Read my recap of 50 books read and 50 movies watched here</span></a>. I had wanted to finish reading Kundera's bibliography, but I got stuck on <i>The Joke</i> (still am). Maybe next year.</div>
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4) <i><b>Go new places.</b></i></div>
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Did this! I didn't get to Africa or the California parks like I'd hoped, but I did get to Milan, Stuttgart, Lugano, and Lucerne, among others. Not complaining.</div>
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5) <i><b>Find somewhere new to volunteer.</b></i></div>
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I found it, now I need to do it ;)</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">6) <i><b>Respond to emails within 24 hours.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">If you have emailed me over the past year, you are laughing as you read this. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">7) <i><b>Use the phone more. Actually connect with people.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">I actually did this!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">8) <i><b>Entertain in the home more.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">Did not do this at all, outside of <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/06/art-of-celebrity-trash-bio-book-clubr.html"><span style="color: red;">Celebrity Trash Book Club</span></a>. Like, not even slightly. That's it, you're all invited over.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">9) <i><b>Travel with a guy I am excited to travel with</b>.</i> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">Last year I set a goal to go on an awesome vacation in 2012 - <i>not</i> with my girlfriends (amazing and fun travel companions though they are). And I did it. I had distinguished, awesome male company. </span><span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">But note to me, next time I need to clarify that I want to travel with a man I am romantically involved with. Because said trip, while brilliant, was with </span><i style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">my father</i><span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">. Har har, universe! </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">But in a most literal sense I guess I can cross this off. Plus, going to see Germany through my Dad's eyes (he went to school there) was on <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html"><span style="color: red;">my Bucket List</span></a>, so I appreciate it on many levels. Done and done.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">10) <i><b>Develop a new talent.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">As-yet undiscovered.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">11) <b><i>Write more</i>.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">Wrote a little bit more, including a new column for <span style="color: red;"><a href="http://www.zanmagazine.com/"><span style="color: red;">Zan Magazine</span></a> </span>which is a dream come true. This year- even more. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: large; line-height: 20px;"><u>THE NEW YEAR</u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">1. <i><b>Learn Italian.</b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">Already signed up. Here we go!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">2. <b><i>Keep healthy but actually tempting foods at home - at all times.</i> </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">If someone ever memorializes me in a painting, they wouldn't be off-base to do the flourescent glow of my face peering into a mostly-empty fridge after a long day at work. I want a full fridge, all the time! And when I say "actually tempting" I mean "not rice cakes". </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">3. <i><b>Double my business. </b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">4. <i><b>Go to New Orleans.</b></i></span><br />
<span style="line-height: 20px;">I have been putting off a trip to New Orleans for years, and it's time to go sit in a bar and listen to some jazz. <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html">The bucket list</a> so requires.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit; line-height: 20px;">5. <i><b>Start volunteering again.</b></i></span><br />
I work with <a href="http://www.realmedicinefoundation.org/"><span style="color: red;">Real Medicine Foundation</span></a> regularly, but I miss the hands-on volunteer experience. Going to get back into it this year, and may train to be a court-appointed special advocate for foster kids (CASA).<br />
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6. <i><b>Hands Up</b></i><br />
Had the horrifying realization that age shows on hands more than face. Must address promptly. My paws are NOT giving me away.<br />
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7. <i><b>Write Regularly</b></i><br />
If I applied the consistency of my coffee breaks to my writing routine, I'd be a pro by now.<br />
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8. <i><b>Do fiftyfifty.me</b></i><br />
This (<a href="http://www.fiftyfifty.me/"><span style="color: red;">www.fiftyfifty.me</span></a>) was one of my favorite resolutions last year - obviously it's the one I really stuck to. Can't wait to do it again. Which means I should probably start, so that December isn't spent in a full-on panic again.<br />
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9. <i><b>Unplug more</b></i><br />
I'm already dreading publishing this list because I already know the people who will make a snarky comment about this when I pick up my phone to check a text. I will unplug on <i>my</i> terms, but I will do it - regularly. I'm sick of my tracking device, aren't you?<br />
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10. <i><b>Get better at wasting time.</b></i><br />
Done living life in a rush, multitasking, etc. This year, we b r e a t h e .<br />
Time I spend being "productive" is better spent with family and friends, honestly.<br />
"Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time."<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Resolutions that did not make the above list:</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">-Lose the sarcasm</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">-Get a 6 pack (except the beer kind. That I will always be up for)</span><br />
<span style="font-size: x-small;">-Drink water (implies that coffee is not water?!)</span><br />
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Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-51025950510993929282012-12-31T16:45:00.000-08:002013-01-02T21:19:17.392-08:00Fiftyfifty.me 2012: DONE!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikMMt_30pjdlH0XM1o18R9_PY4uzwNUMlOj8QZh9-6b9Vw2yCUFY2Zz8MpBmXpo14N6ZiISALt6CfEkj3ZiGRmlNCK0D4zaDo21kbORvJLAsLzBhZpb8A2OgNngX-ghz-hFEIH/s1600/Screen+Shot+2012-12-31+at+4.09.02+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="198" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikMMt_30pjdlH0XM1o18R9_PY4uzwNUMlOj8QZh9-6b9Vw2yCUFY2Zz8MpBmXpo14N6ZiISALt6CfEkj3ZiGRmlNCK0D4zaDo21kbORvJLAsLzBhZpb8A2OgNngX-ghz-hFEIH/s320/Screen+Shot+2012-12-31+at+4.09.02+PM.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I FINISHED FIFTYFIFTY.ME!<br />
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They said it couldn't be done.<br />
They called us crazy.<br />
In some cases they just called us losers.<br />
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Me: "Dad, are you going to join us and do Fiftyfifty.me?!"<br />
Dad: "NO. Unlike you guys, <i>I have a life!!!!!!"</i><br />
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My fiftyfifty.me started like this - <a href="http://jonyang.org/"><span style="color: red;">Jon Yang</span></a> came up with this brilliant idea to read 50 books and watch 50 movies during the year. Inspired, I got the idea that not only would I want to join him (because it sounded like a massive nerdy undertaking, and therefore, just my sort of thing), but perhaps others would too. Looking at our site now, <a href="http://www.fiftyfifty.me/2011/12/sign-up-for-5050-challenge.html"><span style="color: red;">355 people publicly signed on</span></a>, with others doing it on the wings.<br />
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And here we are, one by one, crossing the finish line.<br />
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As you can imagine, my brain is a little bit fried (particularly as I lived the month of December in a state of college finals-style panic). But here's the list! ** denotes favorites.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">BOOKS:</span><br />
1) The Murder of Roger Ackroyd (Agatha Christie)<br />
<b>2) Knowing Your Value (Mika Brzezinski) **</b><br />
3) Before I Go to Sleep (SJ Watson)<br />
4) The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight (Jennifer E Smith)<br />
5) The Tiger's Wife (Tea Obreht)<br />
<b>6) Yeah, I Said It (Wanda Sykes) **</b><br />
7) Food Rules (Michael Pollan)<br />
8) Ender's Game (Orson Scott Card)<br />
9) Before the Mortgage (ed. Christina Amini & Rachel Hutton)<br />
10) Divergent (Veronica Roth)<br />
<b>11) Lions of Little Rock (Kristin Levine) ** <span style="color: blue;">(Loved this one. Read my review <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2012/03/lions-of-little-rock-and-me.html">here</a>)</span></b><br />
12) Stories I Only Tell My Friends (Rob Lowe)<br />
13) StoriTelling (Tori Spelling)<br />
14) Uglies (Scott Westerfield)<br />
15) The Little White Care<br />
16) L'Amant (Marguerite Duras)<br />
17) Fifty Shades of <strike>Crap</strike> Grey<br />
18) The Story Behind the Song<br />
19) Scar Tissue (Anthony Kiedis)<br />
20) Trinity (Leon Uris)<br />
21) Trinity (Leon Uris. 900 pages)<br />
22) But Enough About Me (Jancee Dunn)<br />
<b>23) Gone Girl (Gillian Flynn) **</b><br />
<b>24) I Feel Bad About My Neck (Nora Ephron) **</b><br />
25) Ten Things We Did (and Probably Shouldn't Have) - (Sarah Mylnowski)<br />
26) The Lover's Dictionary (Devid Levithan)<br />
27) I Remember Nothing (and Other Reflections) - (Nora Ephron)<br />
28) Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk (David Sedaris)<br />
29) The Game (Neil Strauss)<br />
30) The Girl in the Flammable Skirt (Aimee Bender)<br />
31) As Husbands Go (Susan Isaacs)<br />
32) Code Name Verity<br />
33) The Giver (Lois Lowry)<br />
34) Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (Mindy Kaling)<br />
35) Where'd You Go, Bernadette? (Maria Semple)<br />
36) More Baths, Less Talking (Nick Hornby)<br />
37) Soulacoaster (R Kelly)<br />
<b>38) The Fault In Our Stars (John Green) **</b><br />
<b>39) How to Be a Woman (Caitlin Moran) **</b><br />
40) The Affair (Lee Child)<br />
41) Dave Barry's Complete Guide to Guys<br />
<b>42) Tiny Beautiful Things (Cheryl Strayed) ** <span style="color: blue;">(Obsessed. Read my review <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2012/12/why-you-should-stop-everything-and-read.html">here</a>)</span></b><br />
43) Seriously, I'm Kidding (Ellen Degeneres)<br />
44) Confessions of a Video Vixen (Karrine Steffans)<br />
45) Maus (Art Spiegelman)<br />
46) Not Dead & Not For Sale (Scott Weiland)<br />
47) Cool, Calm and Contentious (Merrill Markoe)<br />
48) In the Bag (Kate Klise)<br />
49) Smut (Alan Bennett)<br />
50) For the Love of Letters (Samara O'Shea)<br />
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<i>Alternates:</i><br />
You Are a Miserable Excuse for a Hero (Bob Powers)/ Choose Your Own Adventure for adults<br />
The Moon Daughter, Zoe Ghahremani (Pub date: 2013)<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">MOVIES:</span><br />
<b>1) Timer **</b><br />
2) Absurdistan<br />
<b>3) Muppets **</b><br />
4) Gattaca<br />
<b>5) A Separation **</b><br />
<b>6) The Artist **</b><br />
7) In Time<br />
<b>8) W/E ** </b>(one of my absolute favorite films this year)<br />
9) The Joneses<br />
10) Iron Lady<br />
11) Friends with Kids<br />
12) Being Elmo<br />
13) Hunger Games<br />
14) I Do<br />
15) In the Land of Blood and Honey<br />
16) Rue Cases-Negres<br />
17) The Best Marigold Hotel<br />
18) The Grey<br />
<b>19) Rock of Ages **</b><br />
20) The Dictator<br />
<b>21) Little Manhattan **</b><br />
<b>22) The Intouchables </b>(I haven't shut up about this since seeing it)<br />
23) Dark Knight Rises<br />
24) The Descendants<br />
25) Serious Moonlight<br />
26) Ruby Sparks<br />
27) From Rome with Love<br />
28) Up<br />
29) Magic Mike<br />
30) The Names of Love<br />
31) Moonrise Kingdom<br />
32) Mirror Mirror<br />
33) The Runaway Bride<br />
34) Argo<br />
35) The Sessions (The <i>only</i> reason I didn't walk out of this movie was fiftyfifty.me)<br />
<b>36) First Position **</b><br />
37) Katy Perry: Part of Me [oh no she didn't. oh yes, she did]<br />
38) Limitless<br />
<b>39) Anna Karenina **</b><br />
40) Dumb and Dumber (had somehow never seen this)<br />
41) Manon des Sources<br />
42) Out of Sight<br />
43) Rebound<br />
44) Still Bill<br />
45) No Strings Attached<br />
46) Five Year Engagement<br />
47) Safety Not Guaranteed<br />
48) Les Miserables<br />
49) Lincoln<br />
50) Happy<br />
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<b><span style="font-size: large;">Post-Game Wrapup:</span></b><br />
In what is no surprise to anyone who knows me, it was harder for me to get around to the movies than the books. People ask if we cheat and read children's picture books, etc. to get the count up. No, although I did foray into Young Adult books on a few occasions (<i>The Fault in Our Stars</i>, by John Green, is one of the best books I've read in recent years, actually). And I definitely generally found myself more willing to throw a book aside (or turn off a movie) if it wasn't doing the trick. Getting stuck and bored is one of the reasons people turn away from reading, I think, so I managed to avoid that almost completely.<br />
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In general I was so eager to hit the numbers that I gobbled up whatever came my way, which made it a much more interesting year of reading, taking in recommendations from other people at a pace I've never done before. In the end, it's a complete mash of topics and quality, but it was also, without a doubt, fun as hell.<br />
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I am most definitely signing on to do this for 2013. Starting tomorrow, in fact. No rest for the wicked, I say.<br />
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<br />Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com48tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-59515181025372779442012-12-16T18:53:00.003-08:002012-12-16T19:00:16.237-08:00Why You Should Stop Everything and Read: Tiny Beautiful Things<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJu8RmRABurEZQ2YZE3fFX6b1jJaeUaw51L5aQvrtur1VozeJPqSvYHwZUTox_5G7Nqi2UFVnBUZuOFBtPWcSikiy_EXhqBtZc4_J7pJV9YbzeHSxBTzx3bIW3u4xM9b_QKDBt/s1600/Screen+Shot+2012-12-16+at+5.52.25+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJu8RmRABurEZQ2YZE3fFX6b1jJaeUaw51L5aQvrtur1VozeJPqSvYHwZUTox_5G7Nqi2UFVnBUZuOFBtPWcSikiy_EXhqBtZc4_J7pJV9YbzeHSxBTzx3bIW3u4xM9b_QKDBt/s1600/Screen+Shot+2012-12-16+at+5.52.25+PM.png" height="320" width="228" /></a> <br />
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<span style="font-size: large;">I can list on one hand the number of books that have left me breathless and in tears. </span> The most recent is <a href="http://www.cherylstrayed.com/"><span style="color: red;">Cheryl Strayed</span></a>'s <a href="http://www.powells.com/biblio/62-9780307949332-0" style="color: red; font-style: italic;">Tiny Beautiful Things</a>, a compilation from her <span style="color: red;"><a href="http://therumpus.net/sections/blogs/dear-sugar/">Dear Sugar</a></span> column. I had seen the book around, but didn't think much of it. From the cover I thought it might be a shallow dating column from some women's magazine that was already full of enough junk advice that I didn't need more. How mistaken I was.<br />
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I opened <i>Tiny Beautiful Things</i> a couple of days ago and entered a world in which people write in to confess and and try to make sense of their sins, or their deepest fears and insecurities, or their latest personal tragedy, with a complete stranger who responds each and every time with a logic, compassion, and a tapestry of words so beautiful that I found myself literally breathless.</div>
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Although she could have just doled out some smartly-written advice, the brilliance in the column is in how far she goes into the trenches with her readers. She scrapes up the very personal memories and stories, the lessons and experiences we, as strangers, have absolutely no right to access, and lays them before us, like a most patient teacher, so that we may learn something. She doesn't flinch as she offers up her scars, so we can run a finger along them, perhaps even recoil, before looking again. Closely. </div>
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While I have been reading <i>Tiny Beautiful Things</i> I have been consumed by the themes, the plot lines of the letters, and the stories Strayed used to convey her ultimate advice. Consumed, I tell you. I hadn't even finished the book before I'd bought a few copies to fire off to friends, and as I read I kept a mental tally of the others who will find it under their Christmas trees, in their birthday gifts, slipped to them in a moment when they need it most.</div>
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This, my friends, is the key to good writing. We often talk about fiction being transcendent, but I don't think we talk enough about nonfiction and its ability to bring us into other people's stories and lives and make us feel their pain for the moments we share. Dear Sugar's advice is directed at the person who has written in, but in the same way that a parent will say something to a spouse fully knowing the child is listening in. It is written to them, but entirely for our benefit.</div>
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Under the layers of jealousy or greed or regret or guilt or anger, or the hundred other emotions swept onto these pages is an underlying theme that <span style="font-size: large;">we choose how we live</span>. We do not choose our circumstances or the hand we're dealt - and as you read letter pile up on letter, you realize that, no matter how wildly different our lives come out, everyone has problems, everyone has difficult choices to make. Although the details of our individual lives couldn't be more different, the themes are shockingly similar. </div>
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I'm convinced that each reader will take something different away from this book. Me? This: We do not choose some of the detours or roadblocks or forks in the road, but we choose how we proceed. We choose how much compassion and patience we bring to the most difficult circumstances. <i>It isn't meant to be easy</i>, but it can be done. Most importantly, we choose how we work forgiveness - of others and of <i>ourselves</i> - into the narrative of our lives. </div>
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This book may, like me, make you tear up in public - repeatedly. But it will be worth every tightening of the chest, every locked-away story or memory that comes up to visit you. Promise. </div>
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Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-57607492958285401822012-05-26T16:10:00.002-07:002012-05-26T16:10:25.697-07:00Flight ResponseLately I've been talking with friends about people who suddenly announce they're up and moving. I've always been slightly suspicious of it, perhaps because I did this once upon a time in an almost overnight move to San Francisco. I immediately identify this (project it?) as escapism, whether or not it is. <br />
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So what does it mean when today, on an absolutely gorgeous day in San Diego, I'm the one with the overwhelming urge to be <i>anywhere else</i>? Last weekend I was up in LA, both for work and pleasure, and the time flew. Before I knew it I had been there for 3 full days and nights, had been all over town, had seen so many people and done so much. I just felt busy and happy. As I drove home, I was excited to return to my routine and the relaxed life I have created, but then I realized how <i>quiet</i> my life here is. I was in LA for my 10 year reunion and I think the idea of having been in San Diego for a decade now struck me. I've never lived anywhere this long (except my childhood home); was it deliberate or just by chance?<br />
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Sometimes I wonder if I got to San Diego too early. It's an incredible city and absolutely the one I want to spend my later years in. But was showing up here in my 20s right for me? Do I want to be here forever, nonstop? Am I never going to live in a huge metropolitan city again? I guess if you think about anything like that it's overwhelming. <br />
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My 10 year personal retrospective is further pressed by the fact that it seems like more and more people are moving away, something I have a hard time with for a number of reasons (see why <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/goodbye-girl.html">I hate goodbyes</a>), and meanwhile, others get married and develop universes of their own, which in some ways is a moving-on. My mom always told me to hurry up and get married because "Your friends are all around you and going out all the time so you don't notice right now - but they won't always be around" and I thought she had it all wrong. Unfathomable! But as I spent a quiet afternoon at a cafe with my thoughts today, I wonder if maybe she's right. Now, I don't think marriage is a solution to very much in this life, it's more of a parallel adventure, but I guess when someone is annoying you and not doing his laundry or fighting over bills, at least you're <i>occupied</i>. It's never been my style to be in a relationship just to be in one, so unfortunately that strategy won't work, but I'm surprised at how right she was that no matter how close you are with people, they are going to spin off into their own lives eventually. Nothing can be forever.<br />
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Despite my vague threats, I don't think I'll get up and move anywhere, at least not without a bigger reason, because after my SF experience I realized that ultimately your boredom, thoughts, feelings - they all go with you. A place can only entertain you for so long; your reality is right there in the suitcase or moving boxes with you. You can't move because you think there will be more people to entertain you - you have to be the entertaining one, or, as my mom says "Only boring people get bored." I shudder to think of becoming boring. <br />
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My brother always says [apparently my family gives a lot of advice] to pick a city you'd like even if you didn't know anyone there, and I think that's why San Diego has been home to me for so long - it's that city for me. It's a city that I love more and more with each passing year, with every hike I take or new restaurant I discover. But I guess I've been so busy setting up my new company and being involved in 1001 other things that when I stopped for a moment to just relax, I wished there were more people around to do that with, who get it.<br />
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In other news, when this happens I usually just take on another crazy endeavor to entertain myself, and the feeling passes. Might be time to revisit <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html">the bucket list</a>.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-63214369200090981572012-04-02T21:55:00.000-07:002012-04-02T22:54:13.961-07:00What Drives Me.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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This weekend I went to the <a href="http://y-conference.com/y17/">AIGA Y Conference</a> in San Diego. I didn't go because I'm an artist (which, as anyone who has seen me play Draw Something can affirm, I most certainly am not). I didn't even go because <a href="http://www.boygirlparty.com/">I <i>know</i> an artist</a>. I went because I think it's important to try something different on for size, and I was curious to see what I'd learn.<br />
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<b>"<i>Art is the only subject you see<span style="font-size: large;"> from the moment you wake up til you go to sleep.</span></i>"</b> - Nancy Rouemy <br />
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The verdict was favorable: If you have the opportunity to check one out, I would. Y Conference, in its 17th year, involves inspiring talks from the most interesting group of people - a mix of artists, designers, and entrepreneurs who each bring something different to the conversation. You run the risk of developing delusions that you, too, could put hundreds of hours into artwork and produce something palatable. You will leave overflowing with ideas and inspiration, no matter your field.<br />
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Personally, I went in to Y Conference not recognizing a single name on the roster (this is incomprehensible to my artistic friends, but hey, I never asked you to name our Supreme Court justices). Although I had walked in a blank slate, I left with a notebook full of ideas, quotes, and impressions. When I got in my car for the final time, I was converted into a huge admirer of <a href="http://www.karimrachid.com/">Karim Rachid</a>'s work and philosophies, and a fan of both <a href="http://www.andreadezso.com/"><span class="st"><i>Andrea Dezsö</i></span></a>'s artistic range and sense of humor. I was in awe of Eben Bayer's ability to remind us that the most complex technology, the kind we don't even think could exist, was created by Mother Nature long ago (check out <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__XA6B41SQQ">cuttlefish</a>, then check out his company <a href="http://www.ecovativedesign.com/">Ecovative Design</a>). And impressed by both <a href="http://www.andrewbyrom.com/">Andrew Byrom</a> and <a href="http://goforitdesign.carbonmade.com/">Nancy Rouemy</a>'s abilities to bring the challenges of their artistic endeavors to a level that the common village idiot (here: me) could understand, among many others.<br />
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<i><b> "Art is time made visible." </b></i>- <span class="st"><i>Andrea Dezsö</i></span> <br />
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Attend one of these conferences and you'll leave with a better understanding of the intense work artists and designers put into the world around you. It draws your attention, for 48 steady hours, to the thoughtful way people around us approach not just artwork but product design, products you put your hands on every day without thinking twice, so that you <i>won't </i>think twice. It really is astounding. Let me go ahead and make a sweeping statement here: it changed the way I see everything.<br />
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<b><i>"Everything you look at has art -- or lack of art -- in it." </i></b>-- from <a href="http://goforitdesign.carbonmade.com/">Nancy Rouemy</a>'s talk <br />
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The theme of the conference was <i>What Drives You?</i>
To start with: my sister's Toyota. At 7 in the morning. That's what drove me there, anyhow. But as each speaker got on stage to discuss what drove them, I began to wonder what drives me in life, as opposed to up the 5N. So here's the list, or what I think is the list, Dr. Freud:<br />
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<i>Affection</i>. Wanting people around me to be happy. Wanting to show love. Wanting to share all this love in me with other people.<br />
<i>The Written Word</i>. The sound, rules, and playfulness of language.<br />
<i>Understanding. </i>Understanding concepts, understanding people. Feeling understood.<br />
<i>Happiness. </i>As physically expressed. I will do almost anything for a smile.<br />
<i>Optimism.</i> Sometimes relentless. Sometimes misplaced. But always there.<br />
<i>Approval. Appreciation.</i> Sometimes separately, sometimes together. Just being honest.<br />
<i>Collaboration and connection. </i><br />
<i>Growth.</i> Not physical, gave up on that a long time ago! Here I mean growth as in learning something new, accomplishing something different. Rather than just poking around for exploration's sake. I'm not curious for curiosity's sake enough (other than up and going to a professional conference I have no business being at). <i>Adventure. </i><br />
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But what if, like most of the speakers, I just limited it to <i>one</i>? That's the tough part.
Which one is really in the driver's seat?<br />
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What drives <i>you?</i><br />
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<i><b> "The more you look, the more you can use what you see."</b></i> - Nancy Rouemy<br />
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<span class="st"><i></i></span>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-43705805511891923862012-03-24T23:36:00.004-07:002012-03-26T23:22:14.136-07:00Spring CleaningFor Persian New Year ("Nowrooz") we celebrate the first day of spring. This involves a thorough house cleaning that one might suspect was invented by tricky parents to get kids to clean their rooms worldwide. But apparently it really is a thing. So this year I put aside the laptop and my neverending stack of work and got to it. <br />
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<i>My Top 10 Spring Cleaning Finds, 2012:</i><br />
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1) A tee shirt from a "graffiti party" Sigma Kappa sorority bar crawl. What this means is that 72+ sorority women were given white tee shirts and permanent markers, set on a course working their way through a row of college bars, writing on each other all the while. It was both horrifying and hilarious to read this shirt. While I am impressed that my friends could still spell at a time like this, I am horrified that I have kept it. On one piece of cotton there were so many memories that made me laugh out loud, then shudder, then roll the shirt up and squish it back in the box.<br />
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2) Letters from summer camp. I didn't remember who had written to me, but there was the evidence of people who cared about me way more than I've ever given them credit for. There was also a pretty hilarious letter from my dad on massive GASTROINTESTINAL RADIOLOGY journal stationery. Clearly that was kept. The only thing better would be if I could find a stockpile of the blank stationery itself...<br />
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3) French camp song list. Just in case I ever need to sing <i>in French</i> about rowing, I'm all set. Phew. <br />
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4) A love letter. I've been reading <i>For The Love Of Letters </i>by Samara O'Shea and had just read the chapter where she talks about how to write a love letter. She talks about the variations it can take, and gives examples. I sighed, feeling all sorry for myself as I read a letter Keats had written. I wanted a love letter! I wanted someone to pour their heart out on the page. Fast forward one day, and what pops out of the box but a letter in such detail and emotion that I'm floored I forgot it was ever sent to me. It wasn't written on a scroll as I'd hoped and imagined for, but it was in an oversized thank you card and included an insert grading the aspects of what a great tour guide and companion I was on the visit.<br />
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Years later I read it with different eyes than the lovesick girl who would have received it then. It was really quite sweet. I kept it.<br />
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5) My <a href="http://www.boygirlparty.com/">sister</a>'s childhood drawings. Saved those for eBay. (I kid, Susie, I kid! Or do I?...)<br />
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6) My own drawings. I liked drawing the Guns n Roses logo. Over and over and over again. Some people got their edge by drinking Nighttrain or wailing on their guitar. Rebel that I am... I sharpened my pencil.<br />
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7) Postcard from my brother, when he was just learning to write, approx 4 yrs old. I heart you was the main messaging. I miss when he was little and had such an easy time telling me that.<br />
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8) Stories upon stories upon stories. I used to love writing fiction and wrote all the time; it just poured out of me. Somehow after college I stopped writing completely. I blame this on the spirit-thrashing that is the law school experience. I found a script I had begun writing with a friend in high school. He's no longer with us, and I will keep those yellow papers forever if for that reason only. And to remind myself that once upon a time I thought it was appropriate to include Soul Asylum as the lead track in our movie.<br />
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9) College essays offering clear evidence that I was more intelligent and articulate in my late teens than I am now.<br />
I wondered why I would possibly hand in a medieval English paper called "Let's Talk About Sex" and then remembered a friend and I challenged each another to incorporate totally off the wall phrasing into our boring papers. "Handsome young buck" was one I threw him.<br />
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10) A signed and dated document by my dad regretting a certain Presidential vote. A personal treasure.<br />
<br />
The point of spring cleaning is to clear things out, to wipe off the dust, to throw things away. What I found myself doing was spring cleaning my memories. I pulled them out of the box one by one, dusting them off, holding them up to the light, and putting them right back in the box they had come from.<br />
<br />
I can't wait to find all of this all over again.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-88228994844795449722012-03-04T19:39:00.000-08:002012-04-02T23:12:33.208-07:00The Lions of Little Rock. And me.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja0-cU4pA4-79Qs8AkpJYTL9XnUrfULVp_DKlEKrQbWApiF3dlzKRxYZD9O_lz3sPVL58FRcFe9WJffLseopK9gf4B4NJ5wx6NE7m5b9_CDGOBD0aGhQ5lIQbuLqInYv-XckD7/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-03-04+at+7.47.02+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja0-cU4pA4-79Qs8AkpJYTL9XnUrfULVp_DKlEKrQbWApiF3dlzKRxYZD9O_lz3sPVL58FRcFe9WJffLseopK9gf4B4NJ5wx6NE7m5b9_CDGOBD0aGhQ5lIQbuLqInYv-XckD7/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-03-04+at+7.47.02+PM.png" /></a></div>
<a href="http://www.powells.com/biblio/1-9780399256448-2">The Lions of Little Rock</a> by Kristin Levine (book #11 for <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">fiftyfifty.me</a>!) is a stellar Young Adult novel that was recommended to me by a friend. But recommendations can really be hit or miss. After its never-ending series of <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/12/books/review/the-lions-of-little-rock-by-kristin-levine.html">critical kudos</a>, I was relieved to be assured I was in for a good read. What I did not realize was that it would also stir something very personal in me.<br />
<br />
The story takes place in 1958 Arkansas, after the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Rock_Nine">Little Rock Nine</a>, and during a time when local schools inexplicably continued to struggle with whether to stay open if they had to be integrated. More specifically, it is the tale of two young girls, Marlee and Liz. Marlee, who has been shy her whole life, finds reason to open up to Liz, the new kid. But no sooner have they forged this important friendship than Liz disappears from her school. We learn immediately that she was "passing" as a white, and has been found out. These plots points set the backdrop for a fascinating, educational story of a time where you were white or black, period, and where the category you fell in very strictly delineated your opportunities and social circles.<br />
<br />
This novel also gives readers - or hey, me - an opportunity to consider what it might feel like to be forced into a category. Worse yet: what it might be like to be notified that you don't fall into the "appreciated" categories; to know deep down that you are an outsider and yet not want to call attention to that fact.<br />
<br />
As the new magnum opus stupidus <a href="http://www.bravotv.com/shahs-of-sunset"><i>Shahs of Sunset</i></a> prepares to air on Bravo TV and humiliate me, desecrating all that's holy about my centuries-old culture (thank you, Ryan Seacrest), I am forced to think about whether we've really come all that far from the days of segregation. Supposedly, the show will showcase a different side of Persians. The pitch amounts to: Iranians aren't <u>all</u> bearded anti-American freaks! No! They party and sell real estate -- <i>they're just like us</i>! <br />
<br />
Horrifying, really.<br />
<br />
Yet the recent addition of this show to America's cultural lineup proves a fact I often comment upon: Middle Easterners are the last minority you can be openly racist about. Under the guise of railing against the sliver of the population that behaves violently, people post hatred and spit vitriol left and right. To add a little insult to injury, they do so generally. I have yet to meet more than 5 Americans who realize Iranians aren't Arab. They don't bother having to know because it doesn't matter to them. But we all know Chinese people aren't Japanese. You don't need to know much about the nuances of Middle Eastern culture or country boundaries here, because they're all clumped together as evil.<br />
<br />
Recently, while reading the comments section of a news article about the tensions between Iran and other nations, my jaw dropped as I read what people had written. It's not ok to do this with blacks, Latinos, or Asians - if someone wrote about blasting another race off the earth, my guess is the news outlet would have moderated the comment (read: edited it out). But it's open season (since the 1970s) on anyone of Middle Eastern heritage. Born and raised here, I have actually professionally vowed to uphold American law, which is more than I can say for a lot of other citizens, and yet <i>I'm </i>the outsider? Because my hair is black or my grandparents lived on a different continent? <br />
<br />
To be clear, I do not mean to say that the level of segregation, racism, or torment even remotely approaches that of African Americans in the 1950s (or before. or after), but simply to say that perhaps we shouldn't pat ourselves on the back just yet. That maybe American still has some lessons to learn about equality and acceptance and entitlement -- and kindness.<br />
<br />
Turning the pages of Kristin Levine's novel, I was reminded of my time at law school; the Towers had just fallen and, out of concern for the heightened tension in the corridors and violent commentary, a group of Near Eastern students requested a meeting with the then-Dean. At a time when people who even <i>looked</i> Middle Eastern were being attacked nationwide and when his own students who wore <i>hejab </i><i>(</i>a scarf to cover a woman's hair, which some believe is required by the religion) required escorts for safety, it took him <u>over a week</u> to take the meeting.<br />
<br />
When we finally sat down, we began telling him our tales- vicious and worrying comments made in the student lounge, or in one case, aimed at a prominent Middle Eastern professor. Our concerns were met by his dismissal- he quickly reminded us that he considered himself a First Amendment scholar and felt that people had a blanket right to freedom of speech (any scholar will tell you freedom of speech isn't that cut and dry, but I don't pretend this gentleman was a scholar of that sort.)<br />
<br />
IN ANY CASE, he sat back and said:<br />
<br />
<i> "I had no idea there were so many of you here."</i><br />
<br />
He spoke as if, unbeknownst to him, we had "passed"; we had been admitted and walked the halls -- as if we didn't deserve to be there. There were one million things he could have said, or should have said, and yet this was what he used his breath to utter. A case of one person absentmindedly speaking his mind, but he's certainly not the only one who thinks that way. I daresay he wouldn't have taken this same liberty with La Raza in the room or any other ethnic student group. But Middle Easterners aren't so popular these days, so looser lips abound.<br />
<br />
I read <i>The Lions of Little Rock</i> as I filled out an application that required me to fill in the bubble for race. It is something I always struggle with - to me, the options seem limited. We can identify as White, Latino, African-American, Asian, Native American, or Unwilling to Disclose. And so this becomes my cultural identity: Unwilling to Disclose. No one in this country treats me as if they think I'm white (as if white is still the prize or necessity to contribute to and participate in the community), and I hesitate to fill it in every time, so I don't.<br />
<br />
<i>The Lions of Little Rock</i> is a powerful book for so many reasons. On the surface it is a sweet, thoughtful tale, and one might mistakenly file it away as historical fiction and believe that the lessons end there. But the point is that the story is important to us <i>today</i>, and will be every day until we properly square away our racial issues. One can only hope that a unique book like this contributes to a gentler younger generation, one that approaches each and every member of their classroom with more interest and understanding. Not just the black children- <i>all</i> children who look a little bit different than them, or act a little bit different. It is a tale of acceptance that I guess I wish more adults would read and learn from.<br />
<br />
As much as I loved this story and its message of hope, the author couldn't understand me more than when she writes her final words and reminds us: we still have a long way to go.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-21868130010339557522012-02-06T23:11:00.000-08:002012-02-06T23:12:01.734-08:00My Culture Consumption: Roundup #1January was a doozy over here in this thing called life. It was a chance to think long and hard about what is important, so before you dive into reading this post, do me a favor and go text someone you love. (I'd say call them, but let's take baby steps)<br />
<br />
I'm going to follow the footsteps of my <a href="http://jonyang.org/" target="_blank">blogging muse</a> and just dive in on this one, My Culture Consumption: Roundup #1 (Jan - early Feb edition).<br />
<br />
Although the month of January threw some curve balls, it also had some high points and I remained steadfast in <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/fiftyfiftyme-lazy-mans-flash-mob.html">my dedication to fiftyfifty.me</a>.<br />
<br />
Since I last wrote, I have read 3 new books:<br />
<br />
<b>*The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight (book #4)</b><br />
<b>*Food Rules: An Eater's Manual (book #5)</b><br />
<b>*The Tiger's Wife (book #6)</b><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
Now, at first glance you might think I read 2 self help books and yet another <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/06/art-of-celebrity-trash-bio-book-clubr.html">trashy celeb bio</a>, but this is not the case! <b><i> </i></b><br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjegHODNLaysRYx3yG4xbuF5L-4eBE-7iMviL7eznNAVLk3VbzGxeNcNdI5rNRqQucO4qsuXhxkXMRZyQSZ8HJoyH7SlrfvFkmZ0WSMnDjn2WwMUHvzf7w8lLxZhmNwv-bGWn5M/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-22+at+1.03.32+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjegHODNLaysRYx3yG4xbuF5L-4eBE-7iMviL7eznNAVLk3VbzGxeNcNdI5rNRqQucO4qsuXhxkXMRZyQSZ8HJoyH7SlrfvFkmZ0WSMnDjn2WwMUHvzf7w8lLxZhmNwv-bGWn5M/s200/Screen+shot+2012-01-22+at+1.03.32+PM.png" width="126" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">best. title. ever</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
<b>The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight</b><br />
by Jennifer E. Smith<br />
<br />
<b><i>The Statistical Probability of Love at First Sight</i></b> is a sweet and simple YA (young adult, ye non-literary friends in the house) novel about a boy and girl who meet at an airport, and what transpires over the course of the next 24 hours. As someone who can be easily sold on concept, I loved where she went with it, and the clever title had me from the get-go. It is not a question of if this movie will be made into a movie, but when.<br />
<br />
Of course, it made me wonder what the statistical probability of love at first sight would actually be. Ooh, and would the same thing happen to me on my flight the next week? Not so much. In a very symbolic moment about my life, I ended up on the flight where the dude behind me was eating a tuna sandwich. <br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjR6sO_hcC-VOyPm1BuUkRk7iW9EN9bA1NoAUmMS03dSYVcWIAZCRi9HrtHqyy1-cslb08drwUDoAu5iIXOaMboP_x-13Ey3Q6LDSfpq8OxgyiKHFbt896dG3Iji1sxMP5DDH0r/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.11.08+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjR6sO_hcC-VOyPm1BuUkRk7iW9EN9bA1NoAUmMS03dSYVcWIAZCRi9HrtHqyy1-cslb08drwUDoAu5iIXOaMboP_x-13Ey3Q6LDSfpq8OxgyiKHFbt896dG3Iji1sxMP5DDH0r/s200/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.11.08+PM.png" width="129" /></a><b><i> The Tiger's Wife</i> </b><br />
by Tea Obreht<br />
<br />
Books that get a gazillion accolades are truly hit or miss. When I started this one, I got worried. Beautiful cover, 1001 quotes from adoring literary superstars... how would it deliver? And for the first 50 pages, I'll be honest, it didn't. I actually described it to others as "literary molasses". But then the pieces started to come together and I settled into the rhythm of the way the story is braided, and it became more enjoyable. What was most impressive to me was she had created a fairytale for adults. It was unlike anything else I had read, and the depths of her imagination, while at first alienating to me, became astounding.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMfGNHyvWVBfcIFLb06EElfBIRnHbLP8RGB2SAVMjRvqTM4MkiK0p_dNA9aCsHFs-uzxb_Z710-4b2GeCVzQwXR_DTGHIu6Jr2mgJt8S8HK5p-zvxqz6-Qw9i2YONRHdh21Wea/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.09.07+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMfGNHyvWVBfcIFLb06EElfBIRnHbLP8RGB2SAVMjRvqTM4MkiK0p_dNA9aCsHFs-uzxb_Z710-4b2GeCVzQwXR_DTGHIu6Jr2mgJt8S8HK5p-zvxqz6-Qw9i2YONRHdh21Wea/s200/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.09.07+PM.png" width="125" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">eat these, for example.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><i><b> Food Rules: An Eater's Manual </b></i><br />
by Michael Pollan<br />
<br />
<b></b><br />
You'd look at the title and think I could write this one, but it turns out it stumped even me. Apparently food that comes in through the window of your car <i>is not food</i>?? Wish I got the memo before swinging into Jack in the Box yet again. A straightforward compilation of common wisdom regarding eating and health. We've heard some of these items over and again (women's magazines recycle these tips every month, do they not?) And yet the brilliance of the delivery is in the simplicity. I've been cooking at home nonstop since reading it, so it must have worked. Quick, someone take a picture!<br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVVS4psyKyojdbDIMrCdWHLJMI3vU9v6yu7Wdt0-pZ7ltRzjzs4tYQvvXy676up5fgEIG7apnbVLFunkwGvf3peGaAkaFK0YMcRgRQWQ4XahoPo0jS4kwFuJpoelpFSgtAa0NS/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.38.16+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVVS4psyKyojdbDIMrCdWHLJMI3vU9v6yu7Wdt0-pZ7ltRzjzs4tYQvvXy676up5fgEIG7apnbVLFunkwGvf3peGaAkaFK0YMcRgRQWQ4XahoPo0jS4kwFuJpoelpFSgtAa0NS/s200/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.38.16+PM.png" width="133" /></a>Movie-wise I've been slacking. I saw <b><i>The Muppets</i></b><i> (</i>movie #3), the new one with never-lets-me-down Jason Segel and Amy Adams. Then I went on a movie hiatus as I spent hours of my sweet youth watching Downton Abbey (worth 0 pts on fiftyfifty.me, but worth a million to my internal romantic) The Muppets was fantastic because it was delivered in a self-conscious style that allowed it to be self-deprecating and fun; from the start the movie makes you aware that they KNOW it won't live up to traditional Muppet movies, but you're going to have fun with it anyways. And we did. <br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-kXpbEySQvMEJrYf9uBw7Dw4d0sVhpHAx-5quuCPx_k1prf4IF_BJpbHg1J5NBW5ZcGd0Gr1HdibjONmh94SaIuUtZMNYBitVANyv8BziWD-Ltv0XfJdE0GIkpExL5SJTxbnr/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.36.52+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-kXpbEySQvMEJrYf9uBw7Dw4d0sVhpHAx-5quuCPx_k1prf4IF_BJpbHg1J5NBW5ZcGd0Gr1HdibjONmh94SaIuUtZMNYBitVANyv8BziWD-Ltv0XfJdE0GIkpExL5SJTxbnr/s200/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.36.52+PM.png" width="138" /></a>Yesterday I tried to pick up the pace, and watched <b><i>Gattaca</i></b> (movie #4) last night, starring Ethan Hawke and Uma Thurman. Then today I went to see <i><b>A Separation </b></i>(movie #5), the Iranian film that has been nominated for the Best Foreign Film Oscar as well as Best Screenplay.<br />
<br />
One of these was significantly better than the other, in my opinion. That would be the one where Uma Thurman is not playing the ideal woman. (Seriously, she's cute but how are there not one but <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117979/" target="_blank">TWO movies centered on this theme</a>?) <br />
<br />
Set in a future society obsessed with human perfection, I liked the issues that <i>Gattaca</i> raises. It was interesting to watch it so many years after its release; at the time when it came out I'm sure people weren't yet testing to see what gender baby they could conceive, strategizing for a child's best success via selecting the "right" donor at the bank, etc. So I'm sure my experience is different, watching it in a time and place (now) where this testing isn't that much of a wild concept. And perhaps that's what made it even creepier, less of a sci-fi and more of a social warning. So they had concept and the cinematography was beautiful -- but for me the acting fell flat. All I could think of was how happy I was for these two boring people that they found each other. I wanted to do away with the other two and just watch Jude Law, charming as ever. Of course the one interesting one self-incinerates, of <i>course.</i><br />
<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieMcl5ZxTLY_cVKU2E1mNP-JtEV_ZfYd3NCn4dhrYdlXBjUI_68qC_PZxtaFoPc5h8UIZIC1Qlwt0sGwQD28rCKTDoZIlbKIvTU_4d7oHssyCGvGuWQmR_RbT9kO0hBGWMO3BX/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.37.35+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieMcl5ZxTLY_cVKU2E1mNP-JtEV_ZfYd3NCn4dhrYdlXBjUI_68qC_PZxtaFoPc5h8UIZIC1Qlwt0sGwQD28rCKTDoZIlbKIvTU_4d7oHssyCGvGuWQmR_RbT9kO0hBGWMO3BX/s320/Screen+shot+2012-02-06+at+10.37.35+PM.png" width="240" /></a><b><i>A Separation</i></b> probably deserves a post of its own.<br />
<br />
The story, written and directed by Asghar Farhadi, is about a man and woman who are in the process of divorcing- they separate and he is left to raise their daughter and to find care for his father, who is suffering from Alzheimer's. The plot spirals out from there, examining the ripple effects of our actions. The film introduces a cast of absorbing characters through strong acting, heavy but well-delivered themes, and storyline that will stay with you long after you leave the cinema.<br />
<br />
<i>A Separation</i> deserves the accolades it has been getting. But here's the thing: it's not a good movie <i>despite</i> its being from Iran, which I fear is what some people think. It is a good movie because it is done with heart and with universal themes and characters you can readily relate to, however wildly different their circumstances might be from your own.<br />
<br />
For me, the movie and its social ecosystem it reflects is symbolic of Iran (and the world) as a whole- it's much more complex than you could possibly imagine at first glance.<br />
<br />
Nothing is simple. cc: Politicians of the world.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-9722844710765050962012-01-17T00:00:00.000-08:002012-01-17T00:00:59.057-08:00Book #3: Before I Go To Sleep<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9736930-before-i-go-to-sleep" style="float: left; padding-right: 20px;"><img alt="Before I Go to Sleep" border="0" height="200" src="http://photo.goodreads.com/books/1306130484m/9736930.jpg" width="135" /></a><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9736930-before-i-go-to-sleep">Before I Go to Sleep</a> by <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/4470653.S_J_Watson">S.J. Watson</a><br />
<br />
My rating: <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/175147317">3.5 or 4 of 5 stars</a><br />
Book #3 for my <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">fiftyfifty.me</a>!<br />
<br />
Fact: I could only read this book with all the lights on and never right before sleep. Tonight I stayed up reading because I couldn't bear the thought of having it haunt me any longer!<br />
<br />
Additional fact: when I described the plot to <a href="http://www.zoeghahremani.com/" target="_blank">my mom</a>, she was sure she had seen it on Lifetime at some point. So just so you have a sense of what we're dealing with here.<br />
<br />
To that end, it meets the definition of a good thriller: a great hook, strong pacing, and it scares the daylights out of you. The setup reminded me a little bit of <i>Wait Until Dark,</i> a movie you should see if you haven't. Same as in that film, here a woman is deprived of a main sense/function- here, her memory. Every day she learns, and every night when she sleeps, she will forget.<br />
<br />
See what I'm talking about?!<br />
<br />
It definitely held my interest- it's at least a solid 3.5, probably a 4. I found myself rushing forward, needing to know just <i>what the hell</i> was going on! You get points for that, people.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0n-t3329ZSa_ro3aTAvEwd0XsCJog_IqmPmYYo-g2mQEunpewkD08Knr5HC9I8KoJb0oWf-Q_iGxXOHK07-ih4-URDFoqTLm8k2usVB7A8cI-erXHj8_Qvm9Gimv9SqEhlxgh/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-16+at+11.58.54+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0n-t3329ZSa_ro3aTAvEwd0XsCJog_IqmPmYYo-g2mQEunpewkD08Knr5HC9I8KoJb0oWf-Q_iGxXOHK07-ih4-URDFoqTLm8k2usVB7A8cI-erXHj8_Qvm9Gimv9SqEhlxgh/s200/Screen+shot+2012-01-16+at+11.58.54+PM.png" width="194" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I should probably read this next.</td></tr>
</tbody></table><br />
I imagine it's a challenge for a novelist to write the novel of an amnesiac and not bore your reader to tears as the days are repeated; it's well done here. Good mass market-style fiction. Oh, and try not to compare it to the movie Momento: That'll be a losing bet. <br />
<br />
For those of you not inclined to the literary arts, I did check and thankfully this is not a Lifetime movie (that I know of, or at least by this title). It is categorized as "in development" on IMDB. But secretly, part of me is hoping Lifetime does make a movie even sooner. And if it could star Nancy McKeon or Meredith Baxter Birney, all the better! When I'm done posting this I'll write Lifetime a letter.<br />
<br />
Anyhow, it kept me on the edge of my seat with heart palpitations for 3 days straight. I'm considering this book my cardiovascular activity for the week!<br />
</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-67119596502417026642012-01-16T06:50:00.000-08:002012-01-16T06:52:00.276-08:00Book #2: Knowing Your Value<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8K6c5hk0NGiWHsUApjrPejtulnNNNurXj72GE0M8kbDhlhhMLMX5EFrN9Z2QsdAOG8w1gqc7HjXYZFl1UQl53Yxa2CGNUfYPa-ersCn-bjZFNl2bxA9pUHI2fobNbJdelXLDJ/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-16+at+6.59.54+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8K6c5hk0NGiWHsUApjrPejtulnNNNurXj72GE0M8kbDhlhhMLMX5EFrN9Z2QsdAOG8w1gqc7HjXYZFl1UQl53Yxa2CGNUfYPa-ersCn-bjZFNl2bxA9pUHI2fobNbJdelXLDJ/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-16+at+6.59.54+AM.png" width="211" /></a></div><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9893082-knowing-your-value">Knowing Your Value: Negotiating Your Way to the Salary You Deserve</a> by <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/3154272.Mika_Brzezinski">Mika Brzezinski</a><br />
<br />
My rating: <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/256961607">4 of 5 stars</a><br />
<br />
A friend recommended this to me on our Colombia trip. Because she's a writer whose career I admire, I decided to pick it up. But let's be clear: I wasn't really looking forward to it. I thought of it as medicine I should take along the way for my career. I picked up my copy at the local library (yay library!) and was impressed by the fierce woman on the cover. And so I began... and just a few pages in, I knew this was one of those books I'd be talking about for ages to come.<br />
<br />
<i>Knowing Your Value</i> <span style="font-size: large;">should be required reading for any woman who plans on, you know, ever having a job</span>. It isn't about putting a # on your value but on realizing that the traditional ways that women communicate and relate- which often serve us well in our daily lives - actually work very much against us in the work environment. And an important point: it's not about men vs. women, it's about women as their own worst enemy. <br />
<br />
First of all, Mika is extremely likeable and easy to identify with. I knew nothing about her, but now have set my tv to record her show, that sort of thing. Her analysis isn't written from a patronizing point of view (memo to every other advice author) but rather from the angle of someone who has been through a lot and had to earn her lesson-learning the hard way. Her humility is engaging, and inspiring (hey, if she ends up sitting on the desk for her book cover, so could you!)<br />
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Secondly, she pulls in a pool of high profile executives who corroborate what she says in their own ways. So the book ends up feeling like a star-studded focus group, complete with Carol Bartz's foul language, or Trump admitting that if you ask him for too much he'll probably fire you anyhow. It gives what she says additional validity, and more scenarios you are likely to identify with. What do women say that men would never say to themselves? What do men ask for that <i>gets</i> them the higher salaries? What are the possible reasons for those payment disparities we always hear about? How does motherhood affect the equation?<br />
<br />
There were so many quotable passages in here. I found myself constantly bringing it up in conversation as I came to terms with how obvious some of the scenarios were, and yet I'd never really <i>noticed</i> them. I will be buying copies and gifting this for a long time to come.<br />
<br />
Girls, get your read on.<br />
<br />
</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-29033066595136019092012-01-13T22:21:00.000-08:002012-01-13T22:21:32.756-08:00Book #1: The Murder of Roger Ackroyd<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDo_37fBZVHzYuWH0l0nV70umu81sMU7RHF-l-mdzrs-fwTJDbWRDhwmJ5Ba5D8p2pU2RrDYNnhSSS5IymWThfZIfhYI0IJNHpMLRozUA93WyW9e0adb7eTvxs0q4n8yIBqI9D/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.08.53+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="101" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDo_37fBZVHzYuWH0l0nV70umu81sMU7RHF-l-mdzrs-fwTJDbWRDhwmJ5Ba5D8p2pU2RrDYNnhSSS5IymWThfZIfhYI0IJNHpMLRozUA93WyW9e0adb7eTvxs0q4n8yIBqI9D/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.08.53+PM.png" width="320" /></a>FINALLY! Ever since <a href="http://www.jonyang.org/" target="_blank">Jon</a> and I created <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">fiftyfifty.me</a>, a reading/movie challenge, go figure that we got so busy administrating that we haven't gotten a moment to read. And by "we", I mean the royal We here.<br />
<br />
The good news is that I just turned the last page of <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/16328.The_Murder_of_Roger_Ackroyd">The Murder of Roger Ackroyd</a> by <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/123715.Agatha_Christie">Agatha Christie. </a><br />
<br />
Book #1, done!<br />
The bad news: only giving it <a href="http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/257847455">2 of 5 stars</a>. This means "eh".<br />
<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhf664GLcUetOBXs540MWw_nmw0ztMPNZIP07rMlN-fg16YgUKsHLD2f1lSzMrkjCnTPo6iE2BBWGIXQ-KRpIyvqKnwhUTx7-TRpaHHp2oTOQnYXtVYY2PSooP14beOxJCsUch/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.14.42+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhf664GLcUetOBXs540MWw_nmw0ztMPNZIP07rMlN-fg16YgUKsHLD2f1lSzMrkjCnTPo6iE2BBWGIXQ-KRpIyvqKnwhUTx7-TRpaHHp2oTOQnYXtVYY2PSooP14beOxJCsUch/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.14.42+PM.png" width="192" /></a></div><a href="http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/257847455"></a>I have loved other Agatha Christie mysteries but this wasn't a favorite. Too many moving pieces, to begin with. I kept flipping forward to refer to the cast of characters; only a few stood out to me and to the very end I couldn't really tell the butler from the secretary, for example. It barreled forward throwing in details out of left field. Somehow it skidded to a halt that was completely predictable but based on nothing I could have predicted. Sounds odd to say, but if you read it you'll immediately know what I mean. <br />
<br />
I spent more of the time being confounded and retracing my steps/trying to visualize what was going on than getting to sink into the story or even have a hope of getting my own guesses going. That said, I enjoyed her writing along the way, even in my complete confusion.<br />
<br />
The book setup calls to mind ever-beloved Clue; a mansion, a muuuuuurder, and maps of the layout that you have to ponder over. However, in the end it just didn't deliver for me. That said, I believe the book is famous for introducing certain writing devices into mystery. Click <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Murder_of_Roger_Ackroyd" target="_blank"><u>here</u></a> if (and ONLY if) you want a spoiler, ok? <br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV2nTkhuHFQKLxQrb16_DqlezY1Ml3jOei5A_FAKbKsCx-QUHLOOgLvLqk3SvFwrRXVK6FvCl0M05HwdpNUfX5lAT6wBom9n1QsCpBO45uebYhkcdawW-Zz0sORsGYgjLm2CaV/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.15.33+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="141" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhV2nTkhuHFQKLxQrb16_DqlezY1Ml3jOei5A_FAKbKsCx-QUHLOOgLvLqk3SvFwrRXVK6FvCl0M05HwdpNUfX5lAT6wBom9n1QsCpBO45uebYhkcdawW-Zz0sORsGYgjLm2CaV/s200/Screen+shot+2012-01-13+at+10.15.33+PM.png" width="200" /></a></div>Hercule Poirot is a memorable literary character with a pretty awesome name, but I'll stick to the film/tv versions of his subset of Christie tales if they're all like this. <br />
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Will definitely be reading other Agatha Christies for the challenge, I'm sure, but this wasn't the running start I was hoping for! Oh well, I suppose it sets the bar low- my next 49 books better deliver or <i>else</i>.<br />
<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><br />
</div></div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-23531743020839939372012-01-07T09:12:00.000-08:002012-01-13T22:30:20.100-08:00Resolve This.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXkpZucwcj_P9zFwfaoSK779SVv0qxZBLNQnUNPw97KXFTejKfhYlQnlqCPuUtp9CUSEV13BVSMjFmOQEgD3jeMBCe63UE935ad4UaxEMFxGZQza3DDub_QIl6ljGRiT-5Kx5A/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+8.55.49+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="187" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXkpZucwcj_P9zFwfaoSK779SVv0qxZBLNQnUNPw97KXFTejKfhYlQnlqCPuUtp9CUSEV13BVSMjFmOQEgD3jeMBCe63UE935ad4UaxEMFxGZQza3DDub_QIl6ljGRiT-5Kx5A/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+8.55.49+AM.png" width="320" /></a></div>Happy first week of the year down!<br />
<br />
Have I mentioned how much I love making New Year's resolutions? <b>I LOVE MAKING NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS.</b> Sometimes my resolutions overlap with <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html" target="_blank">my bucket list</a>, which as you know by now, I am slightly obsessed with. I think this is all a symptom of my larger list-making obsession. I make resolutions for the regular new year, for Persian New Year/Norooz (March) and on an ongoing basis with friends; any excuse, really. I'm the kind of person who would put "Make new year's resolutions" on my list.<br />
<br />
I used to put my resolutions up on my refrigerator, but one year I had "Learn to knit baby blankets" on my list because so many girlfriends were having kids and I thought they would make cute gifts. Note to self: this is not appropriate decor when a date is over. I had a little explaining to do. So now I'm keeping it between me and my blog (and you, I guess). <br />
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In past years, resolutions have included travel, going out more, drinking more water & wine than soda (I should probably revive that one), stepping it up with the fitness, keeping in better touch with people, making more girlfriends in my city, etc. I've been pretty good about holding myself to them in the past and I hope the pattern will continue this year, but I also hope I will pick more interesting resolutions. The key is really picking things you'll actually do. As I like to point out, certain things are just never gonna happen. I'm not going to give up being sarcastic or quit coffee. I'm not going to magically remember to include attachments when I send emails. So why set myself up for failure?<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCTKYnzwwblOgQxIlZZvAqfIQYRTtWf-qYpuhsZAUx_1mv-wxon-upKAbXjh2Nye1vuhg9p_49qh79vQm1Gs0ZgGR7oKXo2GxPEESe8npmxJI14VI-WJ38YlYeLkcFYkRfbEFt/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.05.08+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCTKYnzwwblOgQxIlZZvAqfIQYRTtWf-qYpuhsZAUx_1mv-wxon-upKAbXjh2Nye1vuhg9p_49qh79vQm1Gs0ZgGR7oKXo2GxPEESe8npmxJI14VI-WJ38YlYeLkcFYkRfbEFt/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.05.08+AM.png" width="158" /></a><br />
This year's list is working out nicely so far, although there aren't too many surprises yet:<br />
<u><br />
</u><br />
<u>2012 Resolutions:</u><br />
1) <i>Do more yoga.</i><br />
Specifically, to learn to do a proper headstand in yoga without collapsing, knocking the wind out of me (and possibly the person next to me)<br />
<br />
2) <i>Don't eat standing up.</i><br />
This is a symptom of my life, which is led largely on the run, like a refugee from the law but much less interesting. So either I need to become <i>that</i> interesting, or I need to sit down and properly get to enjoy my meals.<br />
<br />
3) <i>Do <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">fiftyfifty.me</a>. </i><br />
50 books, 50 movies, all new to me, to be torn through this year. This is the resolution I am by far most excited about. I'm all signed up- are you? I tend to read a lot every year and in the back of my mind aim for 50 books, but haven't ever been able to nail it. Movies, however, are a whole other story. I've only started to become a movie fan in the past few years, and devote little to no time to it. Subresolution: to finish reading Milan Kundera's bibliography. He's my favorite writer by far, and I've saved a few of his books to read on a rainy day (or if ever in the hospital in traction, etc. And yes, I save books for this.) On the off chance the world ends in 2012, I need to probably get to the last few of these ;)<br />
<br />
4) <i>Go new places.</i><br />
This is always on my list. Last year landed me in Nashville and Colombia, two of my favorite vacations, for example. I'm excited to see what opportunities come up this year. New Orleans is definitely in the cards, but I'm worried you'll never be able to tear me out of a jazz bar once I'm seated. I am trying to find a way to get over to Africa, specifically to Senegal. I haven't been to some of the beautiful parks in California. Stuff like that. I don't know where this year will take me, but I've found that actually promising yourself to try new venues leads you to, you know, actually do it. I'm open to suggestions if you have 'em!<br />
<br />
5) <i>Find somewhere new to volunteer. </i><br />
Step it up. I do volunteer communications work with Real Medicine Foundation and I support mAss Kickers Foundation, but I miss hands-on experience working with clients and seeing the first-hand effects of volunteering. So some of that. Perhaps this will be the year I become a Big Sister and formally pass my 80s music knowledge to the next generation? <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdE8RQvP3aA-Yt9P3wEkI9jskBLxW86MKich2IvnGYAEdLbTebqU6hl0WTakNcoEu2WMOdGXDB-b9ci5virId9hCFCABAwq0URSp5U-XPc8NNYLPcLwWZo2Emr-lOVwi6lh85R/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.02.14+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdE8RQvP3aA-Yt9P3wEkI9jskBLxW86MKich2IvnGYAEdLbTebqU6hl0WTakNcoEu2WMOdGXDB-b9ci5virId9hCFCABAwq0URSp5U-XPc8NNYLPcLwWZo2Emr-lOVwi6lh85R/s200/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.02.14+AM.png" width="160" /></a>6) <i>Respond to emails within 24 hours. </i><br />
This is beyond impossible, but it's nice to have goals! I heard this from an executive I work with - and he really does keep to it. Granted, his emails are to the extent of "Thanks" "Sounds good", etc. and I tend to write War and Peace: The Sequel in my emails, but I'd like to get back to people while the content of their emails is still relevant.<br />
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7) <i>Use the phone more, email less. </i><br />
Remember back when we had personal contact? Yeah, that.<br />
<br />
8) <i>Entertain in the home more.</i><br />
I'm constantly out, which is fun but not totally personal and, sure, expensive. I love it but I think this year I'll try to mix it up and make use of my place more- cook dinners, gather friends, just lounge around and make it even more homey. Homie?<br />
<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDQ-s0fP0AwA97jq2ZVeicrAMjg6iKu9sIbGJBKOpZE-aCzh9zyHQjGdv9hO2DOEhnK5lyMU0hhNc2shcSduMNxqpSDtICpNktiS8p1vtICHrwvRp_CnpnjDI7UN3EwRW_Rws4/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.19.58+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDQ-s0fP0AwA97jq2ZVeicrAMjg6iKu9sIbGJBKOpZE-aCzh9zyHQjGdv9hO2DOEhnK5lyMU0hhNc2shcSduMNxqpSDtICpNktiS8p1vtICHrwvRp_CnpnjDI7UN3EwRW_Rws4/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-07+at+9.19.58+AM.png" width="313" /></a><br />
9) <i>Travel guy</i>.<br />
I didn't even know this was a resolution for me, but we were babbling about resolutions when we hiked to the waterfall <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/viva-colombia.html" target="_blank">in Colombia</a> and this one came tumbling out of my mouth. Apparently (says my subconscious?) I want to be with a guy I am excited to travel with, and to go ahead and travel with him. Traveling well together is obviously a great way to assess how you guys fare generally, but I love travel and I realize it's something I need someone else to be into- exploring places, going beyond your limits. From his love of travel I would apparently be able to draw sweeping generalizations about his understanding of his place in the world. Ok, but if we're being honest, there's also the little fact that there are places I want to go that would be a lot of fun with my girlfriends, but a male bodyguard would be nice and/or necessary (for one thing). Plus, as great of a time as we have, I have to stop accidentally going on romantic-destination vacations with my best girlfriends. See also: Mexico, Paris, Greece, cruises, the Caribbean. I mean, seriously.<br />
<br />
10) <i>Develop a new talent.</i><br />
Obviously I don't know what this one is gonna be, but knowing me it will be a little off the wall. Archery, anyone?<i> </i><br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
11) <i>Write more. </i><br />
And here we are.<br />
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<br />
</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-66910077549506179362012-01-03T23:33:00.000-08:002012-01-03T23:33:16.774-08:00fiftyfiftyme: Movie #2, Absurdistan<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-PZvaFm9f9ZM/TwP9WaZlUnI/AAAAAAAAAdc/UmjQ8pUgFqo/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-03+at+11.22.09+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-PZvaFm9f9ZM/TwP9WaZlUnI/AAAAAAAAAdc/UmjQ8pUgFqo/s200/Screen+shot+2012-01-03+at+11.22.09+PM.png" width="160" /></a></div>Ok, apparently we're living in bizarro world, because I just watched my second movie of the challenge, but have yet to finish a single book. <br />
<br />
I visited <a href="http://www.boygirlparty.com/" target="_blank">my sis</a> and we popped in a random comedy we found on Netflix, <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1027658/" target="_blank"><i>Absurdistan</i></a>. I assumed it was the film from the Gary Shteyngart book of the same name (which I haven't read) - turns out I'm wrong. It's a Russian flick and we went into it pretty much blind.<br />
<br />
The premise of the movie is simple- young lovers are finally going to have their first night together, but it coincides with the women of the town going on strike against the men (read: no sex) for continuing to neglect the water shortage in the town. So it's up to our young hero to sort out water for the village and set the gender relations back on track if he wants a night of his own. 'Tis a lot to saddle a young teen with, no?<br />
<br />
<a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-E2uBpsFfeyg/TwP9-ZIeb-I/AAAAAAAAAdo/Xa-Jb_GfDAA/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-03+at+11.29.11+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="207" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-E2uBpsFfeyg/TwP9-ZIeb-I/AAAAAAAAAdo/Xa-Jb_GfDAA/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-03+at+11.29.11+PM.png" width="320" /></a>The movie is beautifully shot- the sets are colorful and engaging, and the story is told with so little dialogue and so much facial expression. It has the feeling of a (slightly raunchy) folk tale, and is a total escape. <br />
<br />
It picked up awards at a few festivals, and I can see why. While this movie takes place in a world none of us can imagine, the gender wars surpass cultural, economical, or linguistic boundaries to be both identifiable and hilarious. My sole complaint is that I felt bad for the guy. To the very end I wasn't entirely convinced why he liked her so much (maybe his miming was better than hers?) I would have kicked her to the curb. But hey, that's what makes it romantic I guess!<br />
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The best thing about it, I researched later, is that it's not entirely absurd. In fact, the movie is <u>based on a true story!</u> Veit Helmer, the writer and director, was inspired by "a 2001 newspaper account of women in the Turkish village of Sirt refusing to accommodate their husbands until they fixed a broken pipeline." <br />
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If I rated movies, this would get a B, but mostly only because I'm stingy with A's.<br />
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2 for 2, people!</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-9853055789209100332012-01-02T19:03:00.000-08:002012-01-03T10:03:01.165-08:00My fiftyfifty.me Begins! (2012)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ei0AGzBFEZo/TwJsOaiJoxI/AAAAAAAAAdQ/qe06F9YOn6Y/s1600/Screen+shot+2012-01-02+at+6.28.20+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-ei0AGzBFEZo/TwJsOaiJoxI/AAAAAAAAAdQ/qe06F9YOn6Y/s320/Screen+shot+2012-01-02+at+6.28.20+PM.png" width="222" /></a>Once upon a time, Jon had this great idea to try and <a href="http://www.fiftyfifty.me/" target="_blank">watch 50 movies and read 50 books in the year 2012</a>. But I've <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/fiftyfiftyme-lazy-mans-flash-mob.html" target="_blank">already told you</a> that part.<br />
<br />
Fast forward to January 1st, when I watched my first movie of 2012. I decided to set a light tone for the year and start with a romantic comedy. I got a few minutes into <i><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0452643/" target="_blank">Love and Other Disasters</a></i>, starring Brittany Murphy, and it was, true to its name, pretty disastrous, mostly in the British accent department. I decided rather than waste time on something I'm not enjoying (hopefully a habit I will keep up throughout the year), I'd try something else. So I started to watch TiMER, which I had saved in my Netflix queue but am not quite sure how I found it. I tend to be willing to watch anything that's a romantic comedy. It's like candy for my little brain. I have a million foreign films and documentaries lined up (just trying to save my street cred here, can you blame me?) but I wanted something easy to slide right into the new year.<br />
<br />
<b>MOVIE #1: TiMER</b><br />
Now, I don't remember how I came across the movie <i><a href="http://www.timerthemovie.com/" target="_blank">TiMER</a></i>, but the concept stuck in my head- it's about a company creating chips they can implant in you that will begin counting down to when you'll meet your soulmate (once that person, too, has a chip). I won't give you the whole synopsis, it's probably worth watching. I identified with more of the dialogue than I expected to, and the characters were all very likeable. But what I enjoyed most was that it had a smart sense of humor and opened up the age-old discussion of whether it's better to know your fate, good or bad, or if you should just wing it. And is there only one person for you?<br />
<br />
Let's be honest, it's not common for romantic comedies to get you thinking. I found myself wondering what I would do, if I would get a bracelet, how it would change things to know that someone was/not coming into your life. Where does timing play into your life? What do you do when, like one character, you find out that your soulmate IS out there... but it'll be approximately 5000+ days until you guys cross paths (apparently the answer is: you sleep around). <br />
A lot of girls (myself included) tend to eyeball whether something is worth their time; we don't, especially in our 30s, do as much of dating because someone is interesting or just funny to be around. We'll move on if we don't see it going somewhere. The irony is that we end things and we don't know if, in a parallel world, it <i>would</i> be the person you end up with, because you close that dorr. In the movie romance quickly becomes subjected to the timer litmus test. In fact, the opening scene is a girl dragging her new (1 month) boyfriend in to get timers so they can figure out if this is worth their time.<br />
<br />
I guess on some level, women already do this, blurting out questions about long-term goals and needs on first dates. (Thanks simply to the bad advice of a dating guru whose butt landed on Oprah's couch) Women often put out awkward feelers early on to figure out if they have the information they need to proceed (or not) with a guy they're seeing. <i>TiMER</i> effectively offers the scientific scenario (hm...perhaps it should be filed under "fantasy" for women??) -- where you could just, with the press of a timer, identify if you're investing your time in the "right" person.<br />
<br />
Ultimately the question becomes whether experience for experience's sake has any value in a world where you could move straight to point B. With a timer it becomes about the destination, not the journey. So pick your side. And having the timer/not becomes somewhat of a social statement in the movie, a ready identifier of people who live by different philosophies regarding fate and romance.<br />
<br />
Would you get a timer if they really existed? After devoting more time to pondering a romantic comedy than I ever have or ever will again, I can safely say that I don't think I would. I don't know that I could handle the pressure or the disappointment of its certainty. I read the horoscope in line at the coffee shop and that's enough to rattle me, so do I really need to know the facts about my long-term future? Nope!<br />
<br />
Anyhow, I was excited to watch my first movie of the year and the fiftyfifty.me challenge, and it got me thinking that I might explore a "sci-fi romantic comedy" major. (Yeah, I didn't know that existed until yesterday either.) It might end up being a minor, because there really aren't that many options. But so far I've found another couple of movies that might fit in my sci fi romcom category, <i>Peggy Sue Got Married </i>(which I've never seen) and <i>Happy Accidents</i> (which I'd never heard of). The key is to see how they can work comedy into it. They always throw a hot chick into sci fi movies to keep the boys entertained, so the challenge is in making it cute.<br />
<br />
By the way, am I the only person who sees "romantic comedy" and automatically thinks "Meg Ryan"? Just wondering. <br />
<br />
As for Book #1, I'm slogging through <a href="http://www.powells.com/biblio/9780385343831" target="_blank"><i>The Tiger's Wife </i>by Tea Obrecht</a>. The book is covered in praise, which can be hit or miss. Usually I'm skeptical, but right now my defenses are down because last year I read <a href="http://www.powells.com/biblio/9780385343831" target="_blank">Jennifer Egan's <i>Visit From the Goon Squad</i></a>, equally decorated with accolades, and it totally delivered. The writing in Tiger is good, but not keeping me up at night. I'm hoping it picks up- I have lots to do! The last time I put so many holds on books/movies at the library I was 12. In the meantime, I will probably diversify and read something else, just so I don't, you know, lose all my enthusiasm about reading. Ok, slightly dramatic.<br />
<br />
If you guys are fiftyfifty'ing, rest assured that I'm trawling your blogs and goodreads lists for suggestions. The question isn't whether I'll get 50/50 done- I think I will. The key is to actually <i>enjoy</i> what I dive into. I can safely say that on movies, I'm 1 for 1 so far. Hooray! </div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-54457616677501144852011-12-26T13:21:00.000-08:002011-12-27T12:56:34.200-08:00My Year in Books (2011)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-94BN9RHHdis/TvjfVZSucfI/AAAAAAAAAcE/JnrIpfPjJ8U/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-26+at+11.53.41+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="304" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-94BN9RHHdis/TvjfVZSucfI/AAAAAAAAAcE/JnrIpfPjJ8U/s400/Screen+shot+2011-12-26+at+11.53.41+AM.png" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">I want this life.</td></tr>
</tbody></table>The end of the year is a time to look back and try to be reflective. Good for you if you look back and try to figure out if you've been a good person, <i>blah blah blah</i>. What I really care about is: <b>What Did I Read? </b><br />
<br />
Every year I start with lofty intentions. This year, yet again, I promised myself that I would read War and Peace. I even bought it! And, surprise surprise, I didn't read it - yet again. I did, however, use it as an extremely useful bedroom doorstop during windy days (true story). I plan on reading it one day, but that's the thing about reading -what you intend to read, and where you actually go with it is completely different.<br />
<br />
Some brilliant writers have taken on this topic, including the hilarious Sara Nelson in her book <i>So Many Books, So Little Time</i>, or my hero Nick Hornby, in his columns What I'm Reading, where he documents what he has bought vs. what he is reading. (Funny how the two never match up). I bought tons of books this year; it was certainly a year of good intentions. But now I look back at my shelves and they are loaded down with serious books like Ingrid Bettancourt's memoir or <i>The Count of Monte Cristo</i> all the way through impulse buys like James Franco's short story collection, all unread. I have to wonder what I really did with my time.<br />
<br />
To date (I have a week left) I have read 37 books. So how did 2011, A Year In Books, work out? <br />
<br />
<b><i>Books Read in 2011:</i></b><br />
<i>Think and Grow Rich</i>, Napoleon Hill (gift from a friend. first book of a year that did not end prosperously, fyi)<br />
<i>Mating</i>, Norman Rush (not instructional)<br />
<i>One Day</i>, David Nicholls <br />
<i>Me</i>, Ricky Martin (any celeb bio that doesn't include a personal photo montage is a shame to the genre)<br />
<i>The Faithful Spy</i>, Alex Berenson<br />
<i>War on Error</i>, Melody Moezzi<br />
<i>No Lifeguard on Duty</i>, Janice Dickinson<br />
<i>Attached</i>, Amir Levine & Rachel Heller <br />
<i>Reinventing Mona</i>, Jennifer Coburn<br />
<i>The Big Love</i>, Sarah Dunn<br />
<i>Who the Hell is Pansy O'Hara?</i>, Jenny Bond and Chris Sheedy (Who the hell IS that? I can't remember)<br />
<i>Why Men Love Bitches</i>, Sherry Argov<br />
<i>The Confessions of Rick James</i>, Rick James<br />
<i>I Am the Messenger</i>, Mark Zusak<br />
<i>You Have to Kiss a Lot of Frogs</i>, Laurie Graff<br />
<i>The Art of Seduction</i>, Robert Greene<br />
<i>Love and Other Impossible Pursuits</i>, Ayelet Waldman<br />
<i>Eating the Dinosaur</i>, Chuck Klosterman<br />
<i>LaToya,</i> LaToya Jackson<br />
<i>Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets</i>, JK Rowling<br />
<i>Book of Illusions</i>, Paul Auster (proof that friends can make stellar recommendations)<br />
<i>Boy Meets Girl</i>, Meg Cabot (she never fails. EVER.)<br />
<i>The Male Brain</i>, Louann Brizendine (there is one!)<br />
<i>Cloud Atlas</i>, David Mitchell<br />
<i>The Maze Runner</i>, James Dashner (precursor to The Hunger Games phenomenon. meh)<br />
<i>Life As I Know It Has Been "Finger Lickin Good"</i>, Colonel Sanders (best title)<br />
<i>The Boy Next Door</i>, Meg Cabot<br />
<i>Donut Days</i>, Lara Zielin<br />
<i>Bossypants</i>, Tina Fey (great writer. weird cover)<br />
<i>The First Time</i>, Cher <br />
<i>Everyone Loves You When You're Dead</i>, Neil Strauss (great concept- "outtakes" from famous interviews)<br />
<i>A Visit From the Goon Squad</i>, Jennifer Egan<br />
<i>The Shadow of the Wind</i>, Carlos Ruiz Zafon<br />
<i>Happy Birthday or Whatever...</i>, Annie Choi<br />
<i>Memoirs of My Melancholy Whores</i>, Gabriel Garcia Marquez (read in Colombia!)<br />
<i>My Booky Wook</i>, Russell Brand<br />
<i>Sky of Red Poppies</i>, Zohreh Ghahremani <br />
<br />
Now, I'm not saying I was a brain trust this year. I alternated between heavy heavy lit and books so light I'm almost embarrassed to list them here. For example, a solid chunk of the books were for <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/06/art-of-celebrity-trash-bio-book-clubr.html" target="_blank">Celebrity Trash Bio Book Club</a>, the greatest book club of all time. Now twelve times a year I now read the life of a celebrity I wouldn't otherwise care about. These are always embarrassingly absorbing page-turners that leave me liking someone who the public disdains for some reason or another, and being able to defend them in conversation with minutae that requires me to then admit my sources. Shameful. But they make reading fun, and that's what it's about.<br />
<br />
<b>WORST BOOK:</b> One Day, David Nicholls. I had this recommended and had picked it up and put it back down so many times, then dove in. I wanted to love it. Girl meets boy. Ooooh! Wait, girl is slightly nerdy and guy is wild child and guys doesn't notice she's there and she slides into girl best friend role? Cool, I could have saved $15 and read my own diary. Jeez. But this is more the worst book of the year for false hopes and expectations, and an eventual movie adaptation starring Anne Hathaway.<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>BEST FICTION:</b> Cloud Atlas by David Mitchell simply blew my mind. Someone had described it as a Russian doll of novels, and that's exactly what it is. This was closely followed by Visit from the Goon Squad, which was a more widely recognized, perhaps more easily digestible novel using some of the same techniques. Both books excited me about the potential of good literature all over again. Mating was also fantastic, but is a lot of work (as is Cloud Atlas). But very smart, and very underlineable; a play on anthropologist studying a relationship (see quotes below).<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>BEST NONFICTION:</b> War on Error by <a href="http://www.melodymoezzi.com/" target="_blank">Melody Moezzi</a>. I had met Melody, a frequent writer for Ms Magazine, The Huffington Post, and a zillion other places, through friends and finally got to sit down and read her book front to back. And that's how it happened because it's a swift, highly intelligent read. A compilation of interviews, it paints an eloquent and engaging view of the breadth of Muslims; how people personalize the faith and interpret it in their lives across the country. It couldn't be more timely or more well-written.<br />
<br />
Also (and on the complete end of the spectrum), The Art of Seduction by Robert Greene. A friend had recommended it and it was absolutely fantastic. It studies the greatest lovers and seducers through history- whether literal or politicians, etc., and breaks the tales down for analysis. Equal parts history, inspiration, and how-to. Incredibly readable.<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>SURPRISE BOOK OF THE YEAR:</b> My mom's <a href="http://www.zoeghahremani.com/" target="_blank">SKY OF RED POPPIES</a>. True story. I had read many early drafts and finally got to sit down with the published, final, completely edited, bound version of the book this year. I was engaged by learning more about the hushed society of Iran in the 1960s, and I found myself laughing out loud or being engaged by passages I had read time and again. Then I turned the last page in tears. It's so rare for fiction to be touching in that way. It's humbling when you know the person who wrote it.<br />
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<b>MOST EMBARRASSING READ:</b> Uh... anything from celebrity trash bio book club? With honorable mention to LaToya Jackson's biography. And yes, I read it in public. And yes, I'd do it all over again. <br />
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<b>WRITERS I'LL KEEP READING:</b> In addition to those mentioned in these shout-outs, Ayelet Waldman and Paul Auster impressed. I finished both of their books sure that at some point I would pick up others by them.<br />
<br />
<b>BOOKS BY OTHER PEOPLE THAT I WILL PICK UP INSPIRED BY THIS YEAR AS A RESULT OF THESE READS: </b> Oriana Fallaci, an Italian journalist mentioned in The Art of Seduction; I want to read more about her. Will read Michael Chabon (finally) now that I've read his wife Waldman. After reading Rick James trash talk Prince (he says he stole all his moves), I will pick up the unauthorized Prince bio for sure and see what he has to say about Rick. Will read about the Branch Davidians/Waco (c/o Klosterman's essay about it) <br />
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<b>QUOTES I LOVED: </b><br />
<br />
<i>"</i><i>The closest you can come in life to experiencing free will is when you do things at random."</i> Mating, p13 <br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>"</i><i>He would say only slightly facetiously that the main effort of arranging your life should be to progressively reduce the amount of time required to decently maintain yourself so that you can have all the time you want for reading."</i> Mating, Norman Rush, p 194.<br />
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<i>"</i><i>Liars are the enemy. They transcend class, sex, and nation. They make everything impossible."</i> Mating, p315<br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>"You fall in love with a person because your subconscious likes something about their subconscious, and it isn't until much later that you discover that that thing your subconscious liked was the fact that this person was built to hurt you in precisely the way you most fear." </i> The Big Love, Sarah Dunn, p146<br />
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<i>"Keep on unfolding, no matter what."</i> The Big Love, p 225 <br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>"Boredom is the ultimate social evil."</i> The Art of Seduction, p130<br />
<br />
<i>"No one is naturally mysterious, at least not for long."</i> The Art of Seduction, Robert Greene, p190<br />
<br />
<i>"People secretly yearn to be led astray by someone who knows where they are going."</i> The Art of Seduction, p315<br />
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<i>"No one is born timid; timidity is a protection we develop. If we never stick our necks out, if we never try, we will never have to suffer the consequences of failure or success."</i> The Art of Seduction, p410<br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>"Our world will not die as a result of the bomb, as the papers say, it will die of laughter, of banality, of making a joke of everything, and a lousy joke at that."</i> The Shadow of the Wind, Carlos Ruiz Zafon, p107<br />
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<i>"Sometimes what matters isn't what one gives but what one gives up."</i> The Shadow of the Wind, p186<br />
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<i>"Life has enough torturers as it is, without you going around moonlighting as a Grand Inquisitor against yourself."</i> The Shadow of the Wind, p319<br />
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<i>"Waiting is the rust of the soul."</i> The Shadow of the Wind, p315<br />
<i><br />
</i><br />
<i>"Inspiration gives no warnings"</i> Memoirs of My Melancholy Whores, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, p4<br />
<br />
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<b>WHAT I LEARNED FROM BOOKS THIS YEAR:</b> That all the rich magnates of the world had the same secret philosophy, and one beautiful leatherbound version later, I'm not sure I know what it is. That there are a lot of people writing books about playing hard to get. That I much prefer to read light chick lit about girls who don't have the slightest clue how to play hard to get and still have it work out for them. That LaToya is less Michael's sister and (as my own sister puts it) "just another crazy fan". That I must pick my YA carefully; not every book is the Hunger Games. That Tina Fey and Russell Brand are excellent writers. That sometimes when a book wins every freaking award out there, it actually deserves them. That I need to read much, much more.<br />
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I just signed up for <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">fiftyfifty.me</a> so there's probably gonna be a little more rhyme and reason, and even more page-turning in 2012. Can't wait!</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-2400257647152970742011-12-12T17:17:00.000-08:002011-12-12T17:27:30.416-08:00Fiftyfifty.me : The Lazy Man's Flash Mob<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijRojCBCvPngMAmefaOGizD6BqVSAKdWKis9DO2FWSiCuyZ-W9ZVgsv_ncopRIdZRPktbr6aoXLu_8a-QSmvQ7jmI6EJsbJ6kuoMO4UAN0PW2PXHhBNGw1RAsyaFi8Xh3s8rAx/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-12+at+3.57.11+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="221" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijRojCBCvPngMAmefaOGizD6BqVSAKdWKis9DO2FWSiCuyZ-W9ZVgsv_ncopRIdZRPktbr6aoXLu_8a-QSmvQ7jmI6EJsbJ6kuoMO4UAN0PW2PXHhBNGw1RAsyaFi8Xh3s8rAx/s320/Screen+shot+2011-12-12+at+3.57.11+PM.png" width="320" /></a></div>As you know by now, I like a <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/heart-of-rock-n-roll.html" target="_blank">good challenge</a>. I am one of those weirdos who actually <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/01/my-bucket-list.html" target="_blank">keeps a bucket list</a>. I'm very much a "Why not?" person when it comes to trying new things (except jumping out of planes. Planes are my chosen form of transportation, people.)<br />
<br />
My friend-author-philosopher-hero Jon mentioned to me that he was going to read 50 books and watch 50 movies in the coming year.<br />
<br />
Are you kidding me? Are you <i>crazy? </i>Who has that kind of time?<br />
<br />
Wait... I want in too.<br />
<br />
And then I thought of a few friends I thought would enjoy it -- so we set to creating the Fifty Fifty challenge. And guess what, you're invited. <br />
<br />
On the <a href="http://fiftyfifty.me/">FiftyFifty.me</a> website, we each offered a post about why we were doing this. <a href="http://www.fiftyfifty.me/2011/12/why-im-doing-this-jon.html" target="_blank">Jon said</a> he was doing it because he needs to read more. He's always reading! But, as per his post, he confessed that he doesn't finish everything he starts, and he tends to read a lot of articles instead of full books. He also confesses to having a spreadsheet about what books he's reading, but that's neither here nor there.<br />
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The thing is, everyone has their own reason for taking a challenge on. Maybe you're bored. Maybe you want cheaper entertainment. Maybe you feel guilty about all those books you bought. Maybe you have way too much time on your hands. Maybe you have insomnia. Maybe you need something to make you feel better about how many hours you spend watching E!<br />
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If something in you is inspired to join us, I hope you'll drop by the fiftyfifty.me website, add your name to the list, and skim the "rules". Introduce yourself, start prepping your list (or, don't make a list at all and see where the year takes you). Tell your friends, make them hold you to it. [For a bonus round, seal your deal with <a href="http://www.getsealit.com/" target="_blank">this handy little app we made</a>. <---- shameless plug by author]<br />
<br />
FiftyFifty.me -- a mob of people, all doing the same thing. But here's the clincher- you don't even have to leave your couch! (I know, that sold me too)<br />
<br />
Now, I didn't say it would be <i>easy</i>. Even though they'd take less time, I envision myself rushing on the film side in December 2012. I am having repeated visions of someone opening my apartment door to find me holed up a la Howard Hughes, watching movie after movie in a desperate attempt to catch up before the deadline. Either way, it will be fun.<br />
<br />
Let me know what you'll be reading/watching in 2012, and if you're up for it, tell me why.<br />
50 books. 50 movies. 1 you. 1 year.<br />
Let's do this.<br />
<br />
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<i><a href="http://www.fiftyfifty.me/2011/12/why-im-doing-this-lilly.html" target="_blank">My fiftyfifty.me post</a> is included below. </i><br />
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**<br />
<br />
<i>Once upon a time there was a girl who read everything she said she wanted to read and watched every movie that had been recommended to her. And she lived happily ever after, or something like that.<br />
<br />
See, it's really all about setting intentions. <br />
<br />
Whenever people walk into my home for the first time, they say "Wow, you have so many books." There are books stacked on my kitchen counter, in stacks in my bedroom, laying by the fireplace, exploding from 2 bookshelves. There is barely enough room for everything I want to read in my life - literally (oh, the puns!). So this is the year I'm going to do it.<br />
<br />
One day when I was being a snob and talking about how I always prefer to read, a friend stopped me and pointed out that books and films are important counterparts. The bookworm in me was horrified, but quickly realized she's right; you probably don't have a completely fulfilled cultural life if you're engaging in one and not the other. It's about finding the right movies to watch; just like it's about the books that keep you up at night.<br />
<br />
I'm looking forward to using this challenge to inspire myself to knock things off my list that have been there forever. To finish my favorite author Milan Kundera's bibliography. To lie around and take in classic films I'm ashamed not to have seen yet (Auntie Mame and Sunset Blvd come to mind). To blow through celeb bios that I have yet to prioritize the time to read (David Hasselhoff, I'm on my way!) To read some of the classics I have never touched. To watch Gladiator and Braveheart so I can stop giving blank looks to men who refer to them constantly. <br />
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More than the challenge to myself, I'm looking forward to hearing and learning about what other people (you!) are reading and watching, 50 times over, rinse and repeat. Basically I'm in it to see what happens when we devote a year to driving ourselves absolutely berzerk trying to get it done. Let the intellectual experiments begin...<br />
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Start stretching!</i></div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-61797492970673940992011-12-12T15:07:00.000-08:002011-12-12T15:08:28.647-08:00Don't Mind the Gap<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_XFOtsMa-pOhYzsHp0Qkp-sTl_xZq1tsX2q54HUpWS8D88GHaCCSCjYG2IEF8lQrHhwgSfdfsmHxnBq9tRxAfPE5IAdmm41brKXfZ1Z0HTlFVlaThKSvRLDmVGulT02DZ7BmU/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-12+at+3.11.47+PM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_XFOtsMa-pOhYzsHp0Qkp-sTl_xZq1tsX2q54HUpWS8D88GHaCCSCjYG2IEF8lQrHhwgSfdfsmHxnBq9tRxAfPE5IAdmm41brKXfZ1Z0HTlFVlaThKSvRLDmVGulT02DZ7BmU/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-12+at+3.11.47+PM.png" /></a></div><br />
<br />
Recently two stories have highlighted the ever-widening generation gap. I am on the losing (read: laughing) end of this.<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Scene 1:</b> </span>Friend, in a car driving kids she volunteers with.<br />
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They put in a cd of the song <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6PN78PS_QsM">Workout by J Cole</a>. She strikes up conversation with them about it, saying "Cool that he used Paula Abdul, huh? Straight up now tell me!..."<br />
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One of the girls turns to her and says "What? Paula Abdul <i>sings??"</i><br />
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**<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>Scene 2:</b></span> A friend and I are <i></i>talking about Halloween with another friend's daughter.<br />
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My friend, to the kid: "Tell Lilly about your costume- and how you were Madonna for Halloween!" <br />
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Kid: "No, I was a graveyard fairy*."<br />
(*note: No, we do not know what this is either)<br />
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My friend: "No! I saw you!" <br />
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Kid: "I was a <i>graveyard fairy." </i><br />
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My friend: "...But you had the gloves. You were Madonna!"<br />
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Kid: "I don't even know who Madonna IS!"<br />
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</div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-76569084606752885442011-12-08T17:37:00.000-08:002012-04-02T23:12:57.819-07:00The Heart of Rock n Roll<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Some part of me thought it would be fun to run a half marathon in the month of December in the desert. The key with this sort of inspiration is to sign up before you can rethink what you're doing. Which I did. Then, before I knew it, it was the start of December. I was fresh off <a href="http://ihavewritersblog.blogspot.com/2011/12/viva-colombia.html">a vacation</a> where I had eaten my way through my target country. I hadn't been on a treadmill in weeks. I had run 8 miles at my peak, so I had to cough up another 5 in order to cross a finish line... at night... in the freezing cold.<br />
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Well, I did it, and my badge of honor is my ghetto limp. Just in case you are so inspired, here's my shorthand guide on How to Survive a Race.<br />
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<b>HOW TO SURVIVE A RACE</b><br />
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<b>1)</b> <b>Pick a race that actually interests you.</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia2mNsjYD4vG9UOFjW276BPKd6-natmmVtZrKJ9B_NzpC3EpuCi0TSbb_pAkAVWrKhyphenhypheny-OdKWzo5xKxsa-W_84meDJrB7A2tWVLCty5-VcjDyomwyDktRMmFNZ_KgiYQk-wc17/s1600/vegas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="191" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia2mNsjYD4vG9UOFjW276BPKd6-natmmVtZrKJ9B_NzpC3EpuCi0TSbb_pAkAVWrKhyphenhypheny-OdKWzo5xKxsa-W_84meDJrB7A2tWVLCty5-VcjDyomwyDktRMmFNZ_KgiYQk-wc17/s200/vegas.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>
I don't mean the distance- pick a course you'll enjoy seeing as you do the run. <span style="font-size: large;">This makes all the difference when you're at mile 9 and want to die. </span> I have done three half marathons- America's Finest City in San Diego, one across the Golden Gate Bridge in San Francisco, and (now) Rock n Roll Las Vegas. The key with RnRLV was that they close off the Strip at night and let all 40,000 of you run like madmen down the middle. It's these little perks, these unusual settings, or views you wouldn't normally get, that will motivate you to keep going.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcVv1LnF_Fofgd3PeiuK1Kx0QaReuPYBZwMKsxfNzgCQOZV07odFhi_eqdtkwdaMtmIeYn6ElF4mWs2WQUa_CjmhXcWEUikE2vhXn5vyQOO5usaalBiD5hZMHAC61j6L87_eY_/s1600/arm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcVv1LnF_Fofgd3PeiuK1Kx0QaReuPYBZwMKsxfNzgCQOZV07odFhi_eqdtkwdaMtmIeYn6ElF4mWs2WQUa_CjmhXcWEUikE2vhXn5vyQOO5usaalBiD5hZMHAC61j6L87_eY_/s320/arm.jpg" width="320" /></a><br />
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<b>2) </b><b> Get inspired.</b><br />
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You need inspiration. Actually, what you need is emotional blackmail.<br />
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We accomplished this using a technique I had read about somewhere- we dedicated each of the 13 miles to someone or something. I included people I love dearly who have passed away, family members, friends who are going through tough times, friends who are just really supportive, organizations that inspire me, and of course myself (mile 13). We wrote our lists on our arms in permanent marker, so as we passed mile markers, we'd roll up our sleeves, look, and chug ahead.<br />
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<b>3) </b><b>Find someone else who has done it, ie. "the bar setter".</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-6_5SMx0rgRF8C435KWB5FT82s29ZRsrVaTH944l3scAxNA0fXwEy94XjpqlFJdeIlbUyinxeqngwx-ZZGEkEMgfU5xlG0K8QUXwHEfSZEw_ZDRMMImS-9SY0ytMNxt1Z-dnl/s1600/book.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-6_5SMx0rgRF8C435KWB5FT82s29ZRsrVaTH944l3scAxNA0fXwEy94XjpqlFJdeIlbUyinxeqngwx-ZZGEkEMgfU5xlG0K8QUXwHEfSZEw_ZDRMMImS-9SY0ytMNxt1Z-dnl/s200/book.jpg" width="147" /></a></div>
Find someone who has done something similar and use them to remind yourself if they can do it, you can too. For me, this person was Dawn Dais, author of <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Nonrunners-Marathon-Guide-Women-Training/dp/1580052053/ref=pd_sim_b_1">The Nonrunner's Guide to Marathon Training for Women</a>. Using herself to set the (self-proclaimed low) bar for fellow runners is completely intentional, and she uses 200+ pages of self-deprecation to remind you of what you're capable of doing if you wipe off the Cheeto dust and stand (for starters).<br />
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And it's true, so much of this is mind over matter. The book is about Dawn's journey from couch potato to marathoner, and is full of hilarious wisdom for how to get yourself over the finish line no matter who you are when you start. You will need to rehydrate, because you will laugh til you cry while reading it. The night before our race, we read aloud from it in the hotel room. Yes, it's that funny. <br />
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(By the way, the title is a misnomer, because nothing in the book is specifically for women. It's so good that I bought my brother a copy. You'll hear about him in a second.)<br />
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<b>4) </b> <b>Find the right attitude.</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZYH-NScZlHMMNjDauqAN5J3LlcwcmLQCIZLtE3IcUVfCNe2-suXY8Vhzrd-kvGj1UIMZ4177Ksa4fvGKLYd7acS0xGGC50i29SbSBZR9mgFYjO673s2t78cAZJu4nvWoIP68M/s1600/cupcake.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZYH-NScZlHMMNjDauqAN5J3LlcwcmLQCIZLtE3IcUVfCNe2-suXY8Vhzrd-kvGj1UIMZ4177Ksa4fvGKLYd7acS0xGGC50i29SbSBZR9mgFYjO673s2t78cAZJu4nvWoIP68M/s200/cupcake.jpg" width="197" /></a>I was running with two people (my best friend and my brother), neither of whom had run a long-distance race. They had to go on faith that when I said it's mind over matter, I meant it. (My brother: "At what point do you admit there is just more matter than mind?") At the Expo the day before the race, we played into the runner's nerves economy and purchased a number of things we probably didn't need, including some cute moisture-wicking Bondi headbands.<br />
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<a href="http://www.cyrusg.com/">Cyrus</a> picked out one that would become our motto throughout the run, inspiring not just us, but every runner we passed (or, in more cases, passed us), "<span style="font-size: large;">Suck it up, Cupcake</span>." For those of you paying close attention, the right attitude is just to have fun with the race. For the 6 miles that my brother and I ran in lockstep during the race, he continued to keep the right attitude, playing air drums and generally just having the time of his life. So much so that a woman found us <i>after</i> the race, as we were walking back into the hotel, and said that she had followed him, his hair, his headband, and his attitude, and paced herself through the race -- and thanked him. <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7Pb1n_plsJx4cNBYe-cb0roSQi-FKqKdq5XyRt73sIalUod8I_F1kMcNRAsS7q5ltzHSkph1S52oiIfY_6uxdjeMPWM0eHeW7cG_sAk89BQ-1kbZ56u2_iLc1gtC56jYH7MoZ/s1600/lillycyrusvegas.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="143" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7Pb1n_plsJx4cNBYe-cb0roSQi-FKqKdq5XyRt73sIalUod8I_F1kMcNRAsS7q5ltzHSkph1S52oiIfY_6uxdjeMPWM0eHeW7cG_sAk89BQ-1kbZ56u2_iLc1gtC56jYH7MoZ/s200/lillycyrusvegas.jpg" width="200" /></a><b>5) Run with people who will keep you going.</b><br />
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My best friend and I handed each other Gu drops, jellybeans, Dixie cups of water, and doses of motivation as we hobbled along the route. My brother made me laugh with his air drumming and the huge smile across his face as he made it further than he imagined he could.<br />
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They key is to run with people who know whether they should stay with you, leave you to run your own pace, stop and stretch with your, and just how to make you feel good about the fact that you're there at all. In my case it was important to have someone who I can psychically communicate with using minimal additional motion, ie. only eyerolling. Also important: run with people who will join you in toasting your weight's worth of bacon cheeseburgers when you're done.<br />
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In addition to whoever's on the course with you, maybe you'll be lucky and have a tech-savvy satellite supporter. My <a href="http://www.boygirlparty.com/">sister</a> had no interest in slogging down the Strip, but she might as well have been by my side through the race. She told me to download an app so she could track where I was and send encouragement. (as an aside: this app didn't work, and when she contacted customer service, they told her we should both reinstall- because, you know, I was really going to stop at mile 7 and REINSTALL THEIR WONKY APP)<br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQu9NLIKrv08oZ26R5ekmEaUPSQiUxH80QfrmzKYPXlPaCugiO8jxRVHBi7-s467T-wDa5A3U2gLPHDK3uFyF4B171yaXQPg2CqC0QIcY_EbWW3InfB18MeguIy3nnxtYambOz/s1600/peesh.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQu9NLIKrv08oZ26R5ekmEaUPSQiUxH80QfrmzKYPXlPaCugiO8jxRVHBi7-s467T-wDa5A3U2gLPHDK3uFyF4B171yaXQPg2CqC0QIcY_EbWW3InfB18MeguIy3nnxtYambOz/s200/peesh.jpg" width="150" /></a><br />
There's something to be said for looking down at your phone (yes, it was attached to my hip. Literally this time) and seeing "woo hoo! go you!" or a picture of an adorable pet holding up motivational posters. <br />
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<b>6) Make a good playlist.</b><br />
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Mine featured James Brown's Living in America. It's a no-brainer that you should lean heavily on the Rocky theme song, Eye of the Tiger, The Final Countdown, and draw liberally from the Footloose soundtrack. I have heard more than one story of people's stereos/iPods, etc getting stuck. In Dawn's book, the weekend she ran the marathon in Hawaii it just <i>happened</i> to be Milkshake weekend. Yikes. On our race, Jessica's iPod limited her songlist during the race to only 30 of the songs. As a result, she never wants to hear Single Ladies again (fact: I wouldn't have wanted to hear it in the first place). All I'm saying is: choose carefully.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFTlR01gYjmovEmJQQfDlNgyGfW1Xr0fOtekrnMuSQIPKyQc74uWNg89ifWAQLOrbN_2hYU0YNR2Ht3-4Aj1ypF2-jF3KQwX3Vui4lrwaijatJxJWj0qplzdZS6J965G97dMzA/s1600/medals.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFTlR01gYjmovEmJQQfDlNgyGfW1Xr0fOtekrnMuSQIPKyQc74uWNg89ifWAQLOrbN_2hYU0YNR2Ht3-4Aj1ypF2-jF3KQwX3Vui4lrwaijatJxJWj0qplzdZS6J965G97dMzA/s200/medals.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">before you know it, you'll have one of these</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<b>7) Accept what is given.</b><br />
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I'm not trying to be all zen here. I mean it literally- accept what is given. They don't hand out water and Gu on the course for their own good. By rehydrating periodically and injecting (not literally) carbs into your system, you will get the bursts of energy that you need when the going gets tough (the tough get going, see #6, above) Don't leave the volunteer standing there holding a cup like a chump- grab it and say thank you. Even if all you want to do is swipe the table of cups clear and lie down on it.<br />
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<b>8) Think less, just put one foot in front of the other, press play, and go.</b><br />
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<span id="goog_1762915466"></span><span id="goog_1762915467"></span></div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-83247574224035957472011-12-06T23:19:00.000-08:002011-12-06T23:24:07.251-08:00Girl Talk, Real Talk: The Regrets EditionAfter one of those weird nights where you spend too much time on Facebook and realize that 99% of the population is engaged or married or propagating the human race while you have been, um, updating your blog, tonight I confessed to one of my best girlfriends that it sometimes feels like other people move forward, and I stay in the same place.<br />
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Her: <i>But you are not stagnate. Just bc you're not married doesn't mean you haven't had amazing life experiences along the way. You just ran a freakin marathon!</i><br />
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Me: <i>You know what I mean ;) If there is a nuclear war, my marathons don't hide with me.</i><br />
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Her: <i>Yeah I do know what you mean. And knowing the guys we date, they'd throw us out of the nuclear bomb shelter.</i><br />
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That's what your girlfriends are there for, folks. Make sure to keep them on speed dial.<br />
<i><br />
</i>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-89805645637772574562011-12-01T23:28:00.000-08:002012-04-02T23:13:18.721-07:00Viva Colombia!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZeFOtXfqZxUPjusc_PsabAL9LBZ30PEZPm41nlDbHEdTNZMU9-efqRX4PfU1bAdPjIeNmSri6tOG7sjycKnujrb4F6C5peCSdSRmSx-XkKTHJ8SDfB0DV91FnXlntL5Q83XY1/s1600/lady.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZeFOtXfqZxUPjusc_PsabAL9LBZ30PEZPm41nlDbHEdTNZMU9-efqRX4PfU1bAdPjIeNmSri6tOG7sjycKnujrb4F6C5peCSdSRmSx-XkKTHJ8SDfB0DV91FnXlntL5Q83XY1/s320/lady.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
If one more person had said, "You're going to COLOMBIA? Why???" I would have gone crazy. Now that I'm back, the real question is why haven't <i>you</i> gone yet? <br />
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Colombia has long been on my list of places to visit, so recently when some college girlfriends were batting around getaway destinations, I threw my suggestion into the list. I was beyond floored when they accepted, but I knew better than to question my luck.<br />
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<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ6iRO9d2ODsKzdDwEpkuRxLHFu_Uw__xV127bxkXcEkhBo88JiokIZQJBLP-zzptTH6EwRX-bF88oo32gCc5jVIaZiLE36PKLkQ9MRzQCDcMJKD1PrY7u58kozkH2LFrMbpTi/s1600/Cartagena+streets.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQ6iRO9d2ODsKzdDwEpkuRxLHFu_Uw__xV127bxkXcEkhBo88JiokIZQJBLP-zzptTH6EwRX-bF88oo32gCc5jVIaZiLE36PKLkQ9MRzQCDcMJKD1PrY7u58kozkH2LFrMbpTi/s320/Cartagena+streets.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">The streets of Cartagena</td></tr>
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Rarely in my life have I gone somewhere with such little frame of reference. (Frame of reference: coffee, soccer, Shakira, coffee) On the upside, we were ready to completely discover, on the downside, we didn't have much of a clue what we were doing. If you were prey to any of the lame stereotypes that exist for this country, you might be put off, or even worried. Fortunately, we were too busy extracting ourselves from work and life to marinate in misconceptions. We nailed the basics early on: our route and the places we'd stay. We decided that we would skip the major cities (Bogota and Medellin) on this trip and land directly in Cartagena. From there we would explore the city for a few days and then wander further north along the coast. All systems go.<br />
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Now, you can admit it if you're not entirely sure where Colombia is on a map. You should know before I go any further. <a href="http://www.google.com/imgres?um=1&hl=en&client=firefox-a&sa=N&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&biw=1074&bih=596&tbm=isch&tbnid=5Mpf7mcnoi5_LM:&imgrefurl=http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/samerica/co.htm&docid=6KQ8V35kv4AUFM&imgurl=http://www.worldatlas.com/webimage/countrys/samerica/cosa.gif&w=320&h=350&ei=ri_XTsbNFujg2QXO1tTkDg&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=234&vpy=152&dur=2856&hovh=235&hovw=215&tx=137&ty=124&sig=101965897615381269855&page=1&tbnh=108&tbnw=97&start=0&ndsp=24&ved=1t:429,r:1,s:0">So here you go</a>, don't worry, I won't tell. <br />
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Colombia is the gateway for many of the continent's imports and exports (go ahead, make your coke jokes- I'll wait). We began in <b>Cartagena</b>, a beautiful port town at the northwest. Tourists tend to go directly into the old walled city, which is what we did for starters. It's beautiful, and it's safe, and <a href="http://www.travelchannel.com/tv-shows/anthony-bourdain/episodes/colombia">Anthony Bourdain had been there</a>.<br />
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Courtesy of <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Attraction_Review-g297476-d2153998-Reviews-Tour_in_Cartagena_with_Marelvy_Pena_Hall-Cartagena.html">the trusty internets</a>, we connected with the incomparable local guide <a href="http://www.tourincartagena.com/"><span lang="EN-US">Marelvy Peña-Hal</span><span lang="EN-US">l</span></a>. Marelvy is a local tour expert fluent in three languages and equally able to guide you through her nation's history in any one of them. We went to La Popa for a beautiful sunset and a vantage point from which you could take in the magnitude of this port city. From up high at La Popa (which used to be a convent- 99% of what we saw in Cartagena <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiOhlnBciNiJbKL-twzDU6YnrD0zr69C-vwa23inET8zFlo44z5Ce5HnxAUA95uu7tmqTZ8uKLWHC_1SHnfhW4fQWmlG39svQYqZNzU_djZvQMeRCXpilt12j26NEGYufMb5_A/s1600/colombian+coffee.jpg" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiiOhlnBciNiJbKL-twzDU6YnrD0zr69C-vwa23inET8zFlo44z5Ce5HnxAUA95uu7tmqTZ8uKLWHC_1SHnfhW4fQWmlG39svQYqZNzU_djZvQMeRCXpilt12j26NEGYufMb5_A/s200/colombian+coffee.jpg" width="150" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">my first cup </td></tr>
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was!), <span style="font-size: large;">you could still hear the music pulsing from the city down below</span>. Spectacular. She took us for our first cup of <a href="http://www.juanvaldezcoffee.com/EN/">Juan Valdez coffee</a>, ambled with us through Portal de los Dulces (a street of homemade sweets vendors), and showed us a few more buildings that used to be convents... We wandered the streets with Marelvy as she told us tales of Simon Bolivar, and pointed out landmarks in Gabriel Garcia Marquez tales.<span class="st"><i></i></span><br />
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Following that, we spent two more days in Cartagena "<span style="font-size: large;">eating our way through Colombia</span>", as I called it. You're not doing the city justice unless you do. (Details and recommendations follow)<br />
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From Cartagena we journeyed 4 hours north in a van. Transport in Colombia is privatized, so you reserve a van and they pick you up. Think of an airport shuttle, but, in this particular case, the "shuttle" was full of people who do not understand the concept of "light packing", "personal space", or "don't sing out loud in small spaces if you are not paid to do so". And you're in the van with them for <i>hours</i>. With no bathroom breaks. It was like a travel reality show, where the award is finding out who is going to handle being incontinent in their old age better.<br />
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To answer the questions that are probably arising in your mind about safety, it was visible that Colombia is taking steps to make the country safer for tourists. As you'd drive the country roads and highways there were soldiers/officers every so often, always with a rifle, but they looked so relaxed that there was no reason for alarm. It was a reassuring presence rather than anything else. At no point were we warned against wandering - some said to watch our purses, but even at the national park we were told it was fine to go it alone (and we did). Common sense seemed to be all you needed.<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Casa de Isabella, Santa Marta</td></tr>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSEZAMZRvsUXTSeVHAXuWQk9-qTpeEwSgf0VccApd5XR99WRlA_93c9J6sxOmkJ82Zd0VDk0j0U2OUkyltRkAPzCHlc-9f8dbhJQwMwc1JEpKalrhRRjv0fnRwvPofHFS1zkEN/s1600/view+from+hostal.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiSEZAMZRvsUXTSeVHAXuWQk9-qTpeEwSgf0VccApd5XR99WRlA_93c9J6sxOmkJ82Zd0VDk0j0U2OUkyltRkAPzCHlc-9f8dbhJQwMwc1JEpKalrhRRjv0fnRwvPofHFS1zkEN/s200/view+from+hostal.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">view from Eco Hostal Yuluka</td></tr>
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We arrived in <b>Santa Marta</b>, the oldest city in South America. The city was a small, intimate beach town, but housed an adorable boutique hotel called <a href="http://www.casadeisabella.com/">Casa de Isabella</a>, whose breakfast is, alone, worth the visit there (read my review <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g297484-d1998392-Reviews-Casa_de_Isabella_Hotel_Boutique-Santa_Marta.html">here</a>). Their staff redefined hospitable, as you can read in <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Hotel_Review-g297484-d1998392-Reviews-Casa_de_Isabella_Hotel_Boutique-Santa_Marta.html">my Tripadvisor rave</a> (always pay the recommendations forward!) Santa Marta is good for eating (a theme throughout the region, we learned), and we walked by the beach and took in the views at the port. It was a quieter town, but we enjoyed the history and the calm. We could feel ourselves inching away from tourist havens and further into the arms of an authentic Colombia (not to be confused with inching into the arms of an authentic Colombian, which did not happen despite daydreams to the contrary).<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbUgcasjoLq792-KHCdE3G7A2wEvXtZNMAoio-PORiPMExK3jJdKJFP4LDcrTd_tMkX_c2GqoVJ1BS99A2_o3i_WRhWfTms_BQa_J0tq3vOj1wTM18B9-QaqGmF27KQk1Gpxt1/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-01+at+9.26.07+PM.png" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="140" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjbUgcasjoLq792-KHCdE3G7A2wEvXtZNMAoio-PORiPMExK3jJdKJFP4LDcrTd_tMkX_c2GqoVJ1BS99A2_o3i_WRhWfTms_BQa_J0tq3vOj1wTM18B9-QaqGmF27KQk1Gpxt1/s200/Screen+shot+2011-12-01+at+9.26.07+PM.png" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Eco Hostal Yuluka</td></tr>
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From Santa Marta we continued a half hour north to the outskirts of <a href="http://wikitravel.org/en/El_Parque_Tayrona">Parque Tayrona</a>. For our visit to the Parque we stayed at the incredibly unique <a href="http://hostal-yuluka.minihostels.com/">Eco Hostal Yuluka</a>, a set of charming, deluxe cabins (think air conditioning and Direct TV) within gorgeous plants and moments away from the entrance. It's Gilligan's Island meets a bed and breakfast. The owners, Wilmar and Nelli, are a lovely young couple who double as fantastic tour guides; without them we would have missed one of my favorite parts of the trip. There isn't a ton happening at the hotel; this is where you'll come to relax after your hike, sip some Colombian beers and play cards with your girlfriends like the cowboys you are. Note: they don't have hot water. Prepare to spongebathe!<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimPcV8aLezFf3wHWcS4SQp7RZ7mi9pjYIB9MXtw3zKvh_eKayGtQSdQNd5Si2rZ1_ppLgzUc-G0FDfUCkJXlmhF4qwp0C9yZCg6wBqv3VfhocmRHNw351p37qtsowiCECivpB9/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-12-01+at+9.27.05+PM.png" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimPcV8aLezFf3wHWcS4SQp7RZ7mi9pjYIB9MXtw3zKvh_eKayGtQSdQNd5Si2rZ1_ppLgzUc-G0FDfUCkJXlmhF4qwp0C9yZCg6wBqv3VfhocmRHNw351p37qtsowiCECivpB9/s320/Screen+shot+2011-12-01+at+9.27.05+PM.png" width="320" /></a>Once our bags were dropped in our beautiful accommodations, we prepared to enter the famed national <b>Parque Tayrona</b>. Picture the lush green of the lush Sierra Nevadas ending in a perfectly turquoise Caribbean Ocean. Take that, Hawaii! Folks who only make it as far as Cartagena or one of the big cities, I hate to break it to you but you are missing out on a global treasure. Photos do not do this place justice - it's heaven incarnate. We hiked in through <i>el bosque</i>, the forest path, arriving at the first beach in about 45 minutes. The first stop is a large campground with a couple of casual restaurants and hammocks tied up in every which direction; it is common for travelers rent a hammock and sleep on the beach. (Travelers who do not like air conditioning and Direct TV, I guess.)<br />
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From there, you hike 15-30 minute intervals before arriving at another outlet to a beach. These beach stops dot the coastline -- we hiked about 4 of the beaches before turning around. Because we went at low season for tourists (November, the end of rainy season), we passed other travelers but didn't deal with the hordes we were told exist during high season. It also meant we could wear bikinis with abandon, a nice perk.<br />
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After galavanting on the beach (said galavanting was punctuated by my screams of pain as I stepped on and into every rock available in that region of the Caribbean). Once we were adequately sunburned and sea watered, we began the hike home. Rather than return the way we came, we left through <i>la playa</i>, the beach path. This path, contrary to name, isn't on the beach, but heads a different direction from the beach, and felt a bit more jungly than the forest, which was incredible given that it couldn't have been more than a half mile away. Rather than just trees, we walked through webs of vines to find our way back to civilization. More tips on that below.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrISKxnpiUMn3piwupcxuac6Dt_lVEbMBPUoIZ0-n2AvONWfqe2HJPd_dOBXaa0l3MhtHO5eBAXBrAqvkLE-ZhMI2F-XAYC3kJO2CxOPWxrZfhkwVA7rdwsj2Ic9j6ANMAFPcy/s1600/hammock.jpg" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrISKxnpiUMn3piwupcxuac6Dt_lVEbMBPUoIZ0-n2AvONWfqe2HJPd_dOBXaa0l3MhtHO5eBAXBrAqvkLE-ZhMI2F-XAYC3kJO2CxOPWxrZfhkwVA7rdwsj2Ic9j6ANMAFPcy/s320/hammock.jpg" width="320" /></a>Our second day in the Parque Tayrona region, we didn't actually go into the park. Our host at the Eco Hostal Yuluka recommended that we visit <b>La casada</b>, the local waterfalls. This required a walk along a river for about a half hour and some scrambling up rocks, but was worth it and was actually my favorite portion of the trip. For the afternoon we were whisked away to a private beach that we had entirely to ourselves- hammocks were tied up for us. <span style="font-size: large;">I laid in mine reading Gabriel Garcia Marquez, rocking back and forth in the wind as another beautiful Colombian storm began to brew, and just taking it all in.</span><br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzvl-GyGo3PidnBqRznVoUX_E-vci9euLrUnzdAkwLZgOHP72MWuZywjH93k4abgPMq6Hocdj06Ux3ev7oh-0ID_56qQ_0YKB8UyEr-aWZCd7HqwU4F51b10MUexVNIKJynJ_D/s1600/waterfalls.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzvl-GyGo3PidnBqRznVoUX_E-vci9euLrUnzdAkwLZgOHP72MWuZywjH93k4abgPMq6Hocdj06Ux3ev7oh-0ID_56qQ_0YKB8UyEr-aWZCd7HqwU4F51b10MUexVNIKJynJ_D/s320/waterfalls.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">La cascada</td></tr>
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<b>TIPS FOR TRAVELING IN COLOMBIA</b><br />
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* <i>Learn some basic Spanish.</i> Time to dust off your high school Spanish, kids. While some people are enthusiastic about practicing their English with you, in the outlying cities English is rare and sign language will only get you so far.<br />
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* <i>Befriend a few trusted figures</i>, for example the concierge at your hotel- get all the details you can. The more specific you are able to be about what you want to do, the easier it will be for people to give you recommendations. Colombians are extremely warm and helpful, but don't make them do all the work.<i> </i><br />
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<i>* Be prepared to eat lots of seafood</i>. The seafood and produce in Colombia are incredibly fresh, and chefs are eager to show it off in their cuisine. Whether it's a fancy restaurant or a casual hut in the jungle, chefs tend to be liberal with the meat portions. This is your chance to try smoked stingray, and I'm warning you that it's unexpectedly delicious. In short, if you are a vegetarian, you may want to preview your food choices or at least get comfortable asking for your food modifications in Spanish so there is no confusion. <i> </i><br />
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<i>*Take an umbrella</i>... but be prepared to leave it there. For some reason unknown to me, I was allowed to take my umbrella IN to Colombia but it was forcibly removed upon my exit. There may actually be an umbrella shortage there. During rainy season, the storms are long and powerful. Forget whatever you've experienced before- this is the stuff flash floods are made of. For us, they tended to happen from about 5-8pm, when it was already dark. We took shelter and enjoyed wine and cheese in our hotel to kill time before late dinner (Colombian style). If you have curly hair, take a helmet or other hair-restraining device. This weather situation is serious, and your vanity should not take the potential for humidity lightly.<br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz0aDhZd7JjKLpBXlBN3ZbeKmqd9ab58jbZr8xuowugROmwxM-oAfQxJrdNp_a6213iijv1IS7oT_YE5CJxO91WWMIbsb2FDJeu0-gG-Xr3RjE_bJGGwDrjQn2zTByCjuq3UnK/s1600/the+wall.jpg" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="150" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz0aDhZd7JjKLpBXlBN3ZbeKmqd9ab58jbZr8xuowugROmwxM-oAfQxJrdNp_a6213iijv1IS7oT_YE5CJxO91WWMIbsb2FDJeu0-gG-Xr3RjE_bJGGwDrjQn2zTByCjuq3UnK/s200/the+wall.jpg" width="200" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">the walls around the old city, Cartagena</td></tr>
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<b>TIPS FOR CARTAGENA</b><br />
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* <i>Take your time wandering the old walled city.</i> Know going into things that the city is difficult to navigate- street names change from block to block, so you'll be working with sight more than names. Become comfortable getting lost and asking for directions.<i> </i><br />
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<i>* Consider hiring a local tour guide to maximize your experience. </i> Actually, don't hire just any guide, book early with <a href="http://www.tourincartagena.com/"><b><span lang="EN-US">Marelvy Peña-Hall</span></b></a>. Her big smile and her customized tours are an essential part of a proper visit to Cartagena. You can trust her to steer you away from the tourist traps, to help you navigate the streets of the town like a local, and to patiently answer even the most inane questions about her beautiful town and country. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU40WJhAh9olFkHpTJhq7z1oRMpEGit9PBufo41q0j-kmbEJ4GfyycwxTa2HsP5bt09MQG6yeSCjTB3xnFnIEw_RxBfTX42fggHkHiV0jzX-bgmFeAdNC4Qt3m5EXdypEawZ67/s1600/Cartagena+sunset2.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjU40WJhAh9olFkHpTJhq7z1oRMpEGit9PBufo41q0j-kmbEJ4GfyycwxTa2HsP5bt09MQG6yeSCjTB3xnFnIEw_RxBfTX42fggHkHiV0jzX-bgmFeAdNC4Qt3m5EXdypEawZ67/s320/Cartagena+sunset2.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Sunset at La Popa</td></tr>
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<li> * <i>Catch sunset at <a href="http://www.cartagenacaribe.com/en/where-to-go/interest-sites/lapopa.htm">La Popa</a>. </i></li>
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<li>* <i>Prepare to eat. </i>When I came back, I joked that I had "eaten my way through Colombia"... except it wasn't really a joke. We went armed with a list of restaurants, so I'll spare you and share the best of here. </li>
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<li><b>Do not miss</b> <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g297476-d779934-Reviews-La_Vitrola-Cartagena.html">La Vitrola</a>- make a reservation because this old world candlelight restaurant is well worth an evening, and everyone seems to know it. Book it first thing upon your arrival, perhaps as a last dinner. The seafood casserole will change your life. </li>
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<li>* Try at least one arepa, a cornmeal patty often stuffed with egg or similar, and chorizo -- yum! Everywhere will have them. An arepa, a sausage, and a bold cup of coffee will remind you why you traveled so far and what we're missing out with when we have crappy diet yogurt for breakfast. </li>
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* The traditional drink is agua diente, which, like many knock-you-on-your-butt liquors, is licorice scented. But tradition is tradition.<br />
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* Stop by <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g297476-d1161396-Reviews-La_Cevicheria-Cartagena.html">La Cevicheria</a> for the best ceviche in town, a cuisine that highlights the freshness of the seafood available to you in Colombia. If it was good enough for Anthony Bourdain -- and me -- it's good enough for you.<br />
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* Enjoy a fun fusion dinner at <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g297476-d779932-Reviews-Cafe_San_Pedro-Cartagena.html">San Pedro</a> or <a href="http://www.tripadvisor.com/Restaurant_Review-g297476-d1458286-Reviews-Juan_del_Mar-Cartagena.html">Juan Del Mar</a>; both restaurants have unusual dishes like curried shrimp, served in beautiful settings where you can relax and people watch to your heart's delight.<br />
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* Lounge around at the <a href="http://www.sofitel.com/es/hotel-1871-sofitel-cartagena-santa-clara/index.shtml">Hotel Santa Clara</a>, the Sofitel. It's (act surprised) an old convent that has been restored into a gorgeous tropical hotel. The weekend brunch is delicious and filling, and even taking in a coffee sitting in their courtyard is beautiful. They have a bar that plays music on the weekends, but if you followed my advice you'll be too full to do anything except roll yourself back to your hotel. <br />
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSHQmn40rMnfBQowX8eHigYgQ7j8QpZXk-8HSsIgH0tfE72SPh7RgH0zzQazhYVA7c6wy_ziJxh8r-OQ-2_IERt0rTi9P06go4eaU-6rdmNrWMDZ67kOBJniBoQaym2hHzeZrj/s1600/beach+Tayrona.jpg" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSHQmn40rMnfBQowX8eHigYgQ7j8QpZXk-8HSsIgH0tfE72SPh7RgH0zzQazhYVA7c6wy_ziJxh8r-OQ-2_IERt0rTi9P06go4eaU-6rdmNrWMDZ67kOBJniBoQaym2hHzeZrj/s320/beach+Tayrona.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Parque Tayrona</td></tr>
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<b>TIPS FOR PARQUE TAYRONA</b><br />
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* <i>Try to have someone drive you IN to the park</i>; otherwise you're adding a few extra kilometers on to your hike by starting at the opening gate. Trust me on this one.<br />
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* <i>Take the forest path in and the beach path out</i>- different paths offer you completely different environments.<br />
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* <i>Avoid walking at dark</i> unless you want bats swooping down on your troop as you wander. Oh, and the park closes.<br />
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* Guides are available (but not necessary) to take you into the park. It's an extremely well-marked park and gives you signs to indicate what % of the way to the beach you are.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQKYCRIZ2o0n7ARI7dEEuDuV62RB6g70KKNeJ6ylMJnbo3JigMNNJoLOFWnyFipWsH565Ff4siCkWypNRn4z_oFGA_Mv8rWPqGZdj0ABWiqMudaNhAT3BuBpkHx6d9XkiVGjZM/s1600/parque.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQKYCRIZ2o0n7ARI7dEEuDuV62RB6g70KKNeJ6ylMJnbo3JigMNNJoLOFWnyFipWsH565Ff4siCkWypNRn4z_oFGA_Mv8rWPqGZdj0ABWiqMudaNhAT3BuBpkHx6d9XkiVGjZM/s320/parque.jpg" width="240" /></a>* <i>Don't swim in the water unless it's an area they've indicated it's ok to do so</i>. The undertow is brutal here and over 100 lives have been lost. Signs are put up every so often to warn you of the same, but in case you're busy enjoying the views and not reading signs, DO NOT SWIM unless you're explicitly told it's ok to do so.<br />
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* <i>Use a pair of shoes you are willing to sacrifice</i>. Somewhere in a garbage can in the innards of Colombia is a well-worn pair of Asics. The tropical rain turns the terrain here to thick mud, and you are going to come home absolutely covered in it.<br />
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*<i> Take bug spray.</i> Use it. Prepare to be eaten anyhow, but realize it's a fraction of what it would have been. <i> </i><br />
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<i>* Take water.</i> There are food stands every so often, but you don't want to totally depend on them. A small bottle of water and even a snack would be good, but if you can buy fresh squeezed juice on the beach, don't miss out.<br />
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* <i>While you're in the area, don't miss La Cascada, the local waterfalls.</i> It's outside of the park but is well worth a few hours of your day to wander in along the beautiful river and to scramble up the rocks and take in the view. Travel lightly for that portion, or you too may donate personal belongings to gods of the waterfall (RIP Tara's glasses, 2011)<br />
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<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">me & my Boygirlparty.com Bon Voyage Journal / Hotel Santa Clara, Cartagena</td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><br /></td></tr>
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<br /></div>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-52322585796877080822011-11-08T10:44:00.000-08:002011-11-08T12:24:54.951-08:00It's My Birthday, and Here's What I Know<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg67ih3DZ6yCSvK6TAEpyGqY8v-yN9nkDFM2NUj0ko8pudnypufxwFcPe7Y_gnC5ynfybcF3XiM0ubOcBK_H7JDzwm599o9oaG0hQ1xNMWfepZitSuZnEbmAdweKYog0XdIj4eh/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-11-08+at+11.15.45+AM.png"><img style="float: left; margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; cursor: pointer; width: 267px; height: 145px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg67ih3DZ6yCSvK6TAEpyGqY8v-yN9nkDFM2NUj0ko8pudnypufxwFcPe7Y_gnC5ynfybcF3XiM0ubOcBK_H7JDzwm599o9oaG0hQ1xNMWfepZitSuZnEbmAdweKYog0XdIj4eh/s200/Screen+shot+2011-11-08+at+11.15.45+AM.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5672704185452257874" border="0" /></a>Yeah yeah yeah, on your birthday you sit down and take measure of what you've learned, where you are, where you're going.<br /><br />Or, if you're procrastinating, it's when you sit down and actually write out all of the above.<br /><br />So here's what I know:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) I am 34.</span> I know this, but hopefully you didn't, at least not when you looked at me. Right?... RIGHT?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2)</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Age ain't nothing but a number. </span> It might seem self-serving as I edge further into my 30s, but it's conveniently true. I have observed this from a line of people, namely the <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/100-old-marathoner-finishes-race-235239203.html">100 year old man who just ran a marathon</a>. And my grandma, who, bless her, in her 90s still lives (mostly) alone and gets even more beautiful with age. And my mom, who is in her 60s and just published <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Sky-Red-Poppies-Zohreh-Ghahremani/dp/0984571604">an incredible novel</a> to much acclaim, just because she's always wanted to. I'm even more inspired by the previous two because we have that whole "genetics" thing going. My mom is still a social butterfly and a beauty and is excited every morning and happy about life; that's an attitude that has nothing to do with when you were born. You can be 16 going on 95 or you can be 95 going on 21. Or you can be 34 and still slightly tempted to lie about it, but that's another story for another day.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3)</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">All you need in life is a few good friends.</span> These good friends will put one candle, not 34, on your birthday cake. Especially if they know what's good for them. You can't choose your family, and hopefully you'll get lucky with them, but if you do, hate to break it to you but... it's not to your credit.<br /><br />As life throws you more curveballs, you tend to notice who your good friends are, who steps up to bat when it's most important to you- and perhaps not so convenient to them. Having even <span style="font-style: italic;">one</span> of these is a blessing. I have quite a few of them. When I see a new baby, I always wish them good friends (in my head, because saying it aloud is a bit psycho, I'm sure you'll agree). You can't choose so many other factors in your life, and you certainly can't predict what events will come, <span style="font-size:130%;">but you can choose who you are in the trenches with</span>. <br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />4) Trust your gut. </span>The first day of law school, I went to a payphone and cried to my mom that I had made the wrong decision. Now, anyone who knows me raises an eyebrow because I am *not* a crier. And secondly, they raise an eyebrow because they can't believe that in the year 1999, I did not have a cell phone.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD_ByA_11vVOKJTvVNYFW8jbHvwP3KoWNUkhuZfE8JwfNMjVl7m2zad2yBsYe3SD3DMSHJf5i3TYg9RySeLnVLzxsQPGMo2Rc88iYr1g48aEbadP7mqbYZxaN7EeA9jm84KRzj/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-11-08+at+12.01.01+PM.png"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 200px; height: 153px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjD_ByA_11vVOKJTvVNYFW8jbHvwP3KoWNUkhuZfE8JwfNMjVl7m2zad2yBsYe3SD3DMSHJf5i3TYg9RySeLnVLzxsQPGMo2Rc88iYr1g48aEbadP7mqbYZxaN7EeA9jm84KRzj/s200/Screen+shot+2011-11-08+at+12.01.01+PM.png" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5672715797682375602" border="0" /></a><br />That was the first in a long line of times I have overridden my gut or done something because I was "supposed" to do it (or not do it). And guess what? It always backfires, sometimes in disastrous and very public ways (see: my perm, circa 1991). As in decisions, as in judgments about people, you have your instincts for a reason. I finally have learned to use them more, question them less, and save myself a lot of internal debates. I prefer to save my mental space for important things, like contemplating why no one stopped Rick Astley from wearing that trench coat-turtleneck combo in his video.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">5)</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">Complain while you're on the treadmill.</span> A girl in high school told me she had given a friend who was complaining about weight this advice: "Complain to me while you're on the treadmill." I hate to side with logic on this one, but I agree. Rather than sit around and complain about what you don't like in your life, complain while you're trying to change it. It takes more work, but it's a tad bit more effective. It takes distinguishing what you can change and what you can't, but this isn't a philosophy lesson.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">6) If you're feeling grateful, pay it forward. </span>Every time I feel grateful for something- my health, people in my life, etc., I try to do something to pay it forward. Sitting around and appreciating things is nice, but doing something with your gratitude is more fulfilling. Everyone close to me (and, in an inappropriately-timed revelation, a recent date...) knows about my obsession with adoption and that my biggest concern is children lacking loving people to help raise them. It seems cruel and unfair, especially when I got hit with a double-dose of serious parenting. So this year for my birthday I asked that my friends (and anyone who is so inspired) to consider donating anything they can to the <a href="http://www.realmedicinefoundation.org/initiative/mama-kevina-comprehensive-secondary-school-project-tororo-uganda">Mama Kevina Boarding School in Uganda</a>, care of <a href="http://www.realmedicinefoundation.org">Real Medicine Foundation</a>, whose work inspires me daily. <br /><br />I always roll my eyes when people say it feels good to do something good. So cheezy. And yet, so true. Feel free to roll your eyes, but if you could do so after you press the Donate button, even better!<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">7)</span> <span style="font-weight: bold;">The more you focus on something, the more you allow it to take over your life.</span><br />See also: The Kardashian phenomenon.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">8) A good cup of coffee fixes everything.</span> I swear by this, as do my friends (at least, the ones I TRUST!) There is nothing I love more than a big cup of coffee with someone I care about, whether it's reheated coffee in my parents' kitchen or a latte with my girlfriends. Coffee has the power to heal, just maybe not heal the shakes I have when I'm done drinking it.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">9) It's mind over matter. </span>I don't know if I believe this, but I'm going to have to when I run the Rock n Roll Las Vegas half marathon, in the middle of the desert and at night in a month. This is also relevant when we consider the fame of certain pop stars and other celebrities. <br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">10) Happiness is a choice. </span>Writing makes me happy, so my decision to write this instead of doing my work right now was completely calculated.<br /><br />In related news, I am overcaffeinated. Today is full of good decisions. Here's hoping the next 34 years are as well.Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6370115.post-50955212114963167712011-09-21T20:10:00.000-07:002012-04-02T23:13:35.528-07:00Death To The Death Penalty!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3ZHjpLTgYo8DprmT56rEJ6vP0TYd2ZTNyW_luBllKVedboGdBBi1YdOeuXR0jvlBJ07PjC0sbBVgXXb38VpeQf91cI2dmBFlTS-sLsRvoRCYIlemlyBxDK-kMoN1WpMVgZvO2/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-09-21+at+8.57.59+PM.png"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5655026755512179522" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3ZHjpLTgYo8DprmT56rEJ6vP0TYd2ZTNyW_luBllKVedboGdBBi1YdOeuXR0jvlBJ07PjC0sbBVgXXb38VpeQf91cI2dmBFlTS-sLsRvoRCYIlemlyBxDK-kMoN1WpMVgZvO2/s200/Screen+shot+2011-09-21+at+8.57.59+PM.png" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: left; height: 185px; margin: 0 10px 10px 0; width: 200px;" /></a><span style="font-size: 100%;">Well, at least my day started out funny- I was participating in jury selection down at the Superior Court, and as I walked into the Department and saw the small swinging wooden door I actually heard the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7iTqoDH0vFU">People's Court theme</a> in my head. Fun day, right? Even funnier when you consider that I have a law degree and almost a decade of legal experience under my belt. And yet my first association is still Judge Wapner. I'm the pride of my profession, I'm sure.<br /><br />On a much heavier note, today was also the day that <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troy_Davis_case">Troy Davis</a> was waiting to hear whether he would be granted a stay of execution for a crime he is convicted of having committed in Georgia-- in 1989. I only learned about this case recently, but it's one you can quickly become passionate about. Some witnesses recanted their testimony, there were contradictions, other suspects were repeatedly named, etc. Beyond a reasonable doubt became "not so much". But the Board didn't stay the execution and in Georgia apparently the Governor doesn't have that power.<br /><br />Tonight people are holding vigils outside the Supreme Court, the last stop for a stay of execution. The news stations couldn't figure out if their sound was out or if the crowd was possibly just <span style="font-style: italic;">that quiet</span>. <span style="font-size: 130%;">It's like America suddenly woke up and remembered the ugly law it conveniently forgot about until it was too late.</span><br /><br />As a kid raised more conservatively, I was probably for the death penalty at one point -- I'm sure I was (right around the same time I was excited my dad had a picture of Reagan in his office). But during college I studied the justice system more. I was exposed to prisoners and at one point interacted with death row inmates (via camera, mom, don't worry).<br /><br />During that time in college when I was learning about the corrections system, the socio-economics of crime, and re-examining my beliefs about the potential for rehabilitation, it really began to consume me. Eventually one night I dreamed that I was on death row. I didn't know what I was being executed for, but I was on the phone pleading, begging my mom to come quickly so I could say goodbye. I remember saying (this is 15 years later, so obviously it was traumatic) "Mom, come quickly. They are going to EXTINGUISH me." I woke up in a sweat and have never once since wavered in my opinion that the death penalty is barbaric, and the type of decision we should not burden ourselves with making.<br /><br />Yet, in various pockets of the country, this is what we do. <span style="font-style: italic;">We extinguish people.</span> Forever. It's one of the completely irreversible things we do- the MOST irreversible thing. In some cases, including the <a href="http://www.reuters.com/article/2011/09/22/us-texas-execution-idUSTRE78K3L820110922?feedType=RSS&feedName=domesticNews">Texan convict executed in Texas today for dragging a black man behind a truck</a>, trust me, every bone in my body WANTS to support capital punishment. But another part of me is willing to give up that revenge if others will give up theirs. Because we are more civilized than that, and especially because we're not always right.<br /><br />Tonight a friend asked me how I propose we make victims' families feel better. And that's just the thing- do you think you really </span><span style="font-size: 100%; font-style: italic;">can</span><span style="font-size: 100%;">? I know that if God forbid something happened to one of my family members, I would want the killer dead. I *get* it. But killing someone doesn't bring someone else back, and it certainly doesn't fix a much bigger problematic system. And many victims even agree with me - read about <a href="http://www.mvfr.org/">this amazing anti-DP organization run by victims and their families, for one</a>.<br /><br />And our system is a mess. If we run the risk of killing even one innocent person (and the numbers of wrongly convicted people popping up through <a href="http://www.innocenceproject.org/">Innocence Projects</a> is rising), <span style="font-size: 130%;">we owe it to ourselves to revisit what we are trying to accomplish and if we're really accomplishing it</span>. We are failing ourselves if we stop short. What the death penalty does is satisfy some people's need for revenge, while creating a new generation of suffering in the convict's family. We're shifting where the anger and the anguish reside, but we're not getting rid of it.<br /><br />OH, and not sure if you heard, but we're in a recession, and the death penalty is pricey. Do we really think we have the extra change to pay for this little habit of ours? To give one example, in my state, California, the current system costs $137 million per year; it would cost $11.5 million for a system without the death penalty.<i> <span style="font-size: 85%;">(<a href="http://www.ccfaj.org/rr-dp-official.html" target="_blank">California Commission for the Fair Administration of Justice</a>, July 2008)</span></i><br />Do you know what I would do with that extra $125M? A hell of a lot. I would infuse it into our education system for one thing. (You can use <a href="http://liveunited.org/pages/common-good-forecaster">the Common Good Forecaster tool</a> to examine the impact a rise of education would have in your way- a drop in crime, for one thing.)<br /><br />If we're tightening our belts, America, maybe we can stop pouring our time, attention, and resources into controversy and anger, and put our money, for once, where the returns are guaranteed? Just a thought.<br /><br />And in the meantime, all of you who raise a fuss (or ignore) the one time a year a jury summons<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzVN0lYdS9f5hvJTddjrQbFwcVb9gY-CV6-SrhQOig4jf3nLGVCkwhWAJH3gp5R3J7j38hebd-rm8x9AtnPeAt0YQscHBReM0Cv4SdAFtYb-hQS6pJ27JW07vYm_cl5ovaN0o7/s1600/Screen+shot+2011-09-21+at+8.59.11+PM.png"><img alt="" border="0" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5655027212488613746" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzVN0lYdS9f5hvJTddjrQbFwcVb9gY-CV6-SrhQOig4jf3nLGVCkwhWAJH3gp5R3J7j38hebd-rm8x9AtnPeAt0YQscHBReM0Cv4SdAFtYb-hQS6pJ27JW07vYm_cl5ovaN0o7/s200/Screen+shot+2011-09-21+at+8.59.11+PM.png" style="cursor: hand; cursor: pointer; float: right; height: 200px; margin: 0 0 10px 10px; width: 130px;" /></a> shows up at your door (and I can tell you off, because I used to be one of you): Go. Sit. Listen. Participate. Do not take our system for granted. And definitely <span style="font-size: 130%;">don't waste my time venting about verdicts you don't care for when you can't be troubled to take the day off work to give a verdict yourself.</span><br /><br />The justice system is a living, breathing thing, and is powered by people in the community. So tap into your inner Judge Judy or Judge Wapner, or hell, <a href="http://www.imdb.com/character/ch0036669/">Judge Harry Stone</a> -- and get yourself there. People's lives actually do depend on you.<br /></span><span style="font-size: 100%; font-style: italic;">Troy Davis died at 11:08 ET this evening.</span>Bookgirlhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01111267746814351127noreply@blogger.com0